The top-of-the-line PC I ordered was obsolete before I finished entering my credit card number

I decided to order my new gaming PC online because I could get up-to-the-minute parts. I went to my favorite vendor and started building the best possible PC via a series of drop down menus. Every time I clicked on the button labeled “refresh price,” new components were available.

Finally I had set up a PC that I thought was pretty good and when I clicked submit, it popped up a dialog box that said, “New special offer! Save 10% on antique systems such as yours!”

When I finished entering my billing data, the website explained to me that it’ll take two weeks to build and deliver my system. Two weeks!? What if someone released a game with ‘cutting edge’ technology during that time? My system would only be capable of playing last month’s games!

My PC finally arrived in a box labeled “Derelict.” When I opened it there was a letter inside warning me that by plugging in my machine and booting it up, I would make it less valuable for collectors who specialized in old hardware from days gone by.

When I ordered the machine it came bundled with “Windows MC,” a rare breed of the Windows operating system that was popular during the weekend when I bought it but has since be shunned by Microsoft. When I turned on the machine, a dialogue popped up that said “Warning: System incapable of playing Star Wars Galaxies when it comes out.” Then I hit the “auto-update” button and a message appeared that said “Your system is no longer supported and must be destroyed before contaminating the Internet.” I went to turn it off and it said “unable to shut down pending state historical landmark status.”

I would show it to you, but some restoration specialists stopped by and are looking into how to best preserve my machine for future generations to admire.


Victim Pic Small

Right now they’re carefully opening the CD drive to look for fossilized remains of prehistoric life.


Score: 8.06; Total Votes: 2522 as of 2009-12-09.


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