If You Guys Had Just Talked to Me before You Released Arcanum…
That’s right, before you shipped that sucker, you shoulda talked to me! Samuel T. Breckenridge! I’ll tell you why.
When you hit the ‘esc’ key in the game, you go to the menu. When you hit it again, you get back into the game. But when you die, and you go to the menu, and you hit ‘esc,’ you exit the game! BAM! To Windows! That’s bad user interface, son, and that’s exactly the kind of thing that wouldn’t happen if you had talked to me – Samuel T. Breckenridge – before you had released your product!
Gather round, listen up. Some of the greatest gaming blunders in history could have been solved before release had the expertise of Samuel T. Breckenridge come into play. You know how in Black and White it shipped with that bug where your creature would get permanently cursed on island 5? Solemn oath, folks: I never woulda let that happen. Imagine the lives that coulda been spared if that game had come through me! Samuel T. Breckenridge! Say it again:
Samuel T. Breckenridge!
Here’s my card, here’s my card. Just send me your gold masters before they go to press, young game developers, and I will help you sleep easy.
Fee? What fee? Oh, there’s a small $100K stipend I charge for playing your games, but evaluate that against ANOTHER ball-crushing esc-key mishap. Hear what I’m saying, boys?
Score: 5.45; Total Votes: 1316 as of 2009-12-09.