The Daily Victim was GameSpy's daily tribute to the millions of fine people who populated Internet culture. Every weekday a new victim was posted. The most beloved victims returned in their full-color feature and continued story each week.
| Score |
Votes |
Date |
Links |
Color |
Title |
| 6.15 |
1,590 |
2000-10-02 |
0 |
No |
Those Guys Who Ganged up on Me in Starcraft the Other Day Were Probably Lovers |
| 8.49 |
3,506 |
2000-10-03 |
6 |
No |
I Overclock All of My Appliances |
| 5.17 |
1,165 |
2000-10-04 |
0 |
No |
Those Guys in Customs Really Need to Lighten up |
| 7.60 |
2,892 |
2000-10-05 |
2 |
No |
Hello? I Spilled Zima into My Boyfriend's Counter-strike Server |
| 6.51 |
2,335 |
2000-10-06 |
1 |
No |
There's Not Enough Force Feedback in My Life |
| 4.43 |
1,716 |
2000-10-09 |
0 |
No |
Your Entire Computer Network Is at the Mercy of My Razor Sharp Beaver Teeth |
| 7.95 |
3,353 |
2000-10-10 |
5 |
No |
I've Been Defending This Flag since You Were in Your Father's Scrotum |
| 5.19 |
1,853 |
2000-10-11 |
0 |
No |
I Didn't Mean to Read the Star Wars Spoiler Page |
| 6.47 |
1,793 |
2000-10-12 |
2 |
No |
Do Not Interrupt Me When I Lick the Lucky Kitty |
| 7.45 |
1,365 |
2000-10-13 |
1 |
No |
It's Not That I Don't like Pookie. I'm Simply Suggesting That We Find a Web Site Mascot That Is Less Likely to Pee on My Head. |
| 8.05 |
1,573 |
2000-10-14 |
7 |
Yes |
This Week's Winner: Overclocked Appliance Guy |
| 7.51 |
1,682 |
2000-10-16 |
2 |
No |
Those Things Said about My Mom on the Tribes Server Last Night Weren't True |
| 7.46 |
1,685 |
2000-10-17 |
1 |
No |
I Couldn't Stop Eating Meat |
| 7.80 |
2,248 |
2000-10-18 |
4 |
No |
Why, Yes. My New Job Title Is Just an Excuse to Play Asheron's Call All Day. |
| 4.75 |
1,017 |
2000-10-19 |
0 |
No |
Why Do We Eat This So-called "Hot Sauce?" |
| 6.37 |
978 |
2000-10-20 |
1 |
No |
The Marketing of New Catch Phrases Is a Serious, Difficult Business |
| 8.71 |
2,340 |
2000-10-21 |
4 |
Yes |
This Week's Winner: the Discovery of an Enemy Flag Base Has Destroyed the Shallow Cocoon That Was Once My Life |
| 6.13 |
1,072 |
2000-10-23 |
0 |
No |
Mario Is Teaching My Son to Flash the Wrong Gang Symbols |
| 7.94 |
1,606 |
2000-10-24 |
1 |
No |
The Exploding Toilet Was the Best Part of Lethal Weapon 3 |
| 6.24 |
1,221 |
2000-10-25 |
0 |
No |
The PS2 Will Have Unbridled Masturbatory Capabilities |
| 6.24 |
962 |
2000-10-26 |
0 |
No |
I Cannot Be Held Responsible for My Human's Recent Hacker Attack on Your Server |
| 6.30 |
948 |
2000-10-27 |
0 |
No |
Faster, Post-it Note! Kill! Kill! |
| 8.92 |
3,196 |
2000-10-28 |
8 |
Yes |
Careful Career Maneuvering Will Allow Me to Continue Playing Asheron's Call All Day While the Paychecks Never Cease |
| 7.39 |
1,382 |
2000-10-30 |
1 |
No |
The Zombies Cannot Possibly Kill Me When I'm This Wired on Jolt Cola |
| 5.36 |
1,068 |
2000-10-31 |
0 |
No |
I Cannot Master the Torso Twist |
| 6.85 |
1,044 |
2000-11-01 |
1 |
No |
Every Time Our Statistics Server Goes Down, I Will Cut off Someone's Ear |
| 6.69 |
1,000 |
2000-11-02 |
1 |
No |
I Can Move Pikachu ... with My Mind! |
| 6.51 |
823 |
2000-11-03 |
0 |
No |
Failure to Drink Your Milk Will Result in Enormous Tentacles Devouring Your Body Whole |
| 7.05 |
1,202 |
2000-11-04 |
2 |
Yes |
I Totally Woulda Scored with That Chick on the Tribes Server If My Roommate Hadn't Logged on and Started Talking Smack about My Momma |
| 7.79 |
1,673 |
2000-11-06 |
2 |
No |
Woe to Ye, Internet Service Provider! |
| 7.07 |
1,018 |
2000-11-07 |
0 |
No |
Honey, I Love You, but Don't See Any Reason to Leave This Perfectly Good Elite Force Server. |
| 6.33 |
729 |
2000-11-08 |
0 |
No |
The Playstation's So-called "Emotion" Engine Fails to Give Me Even a Hint of Human Compassion |
| 7.46 |
680 |
2000-11-09 |
0 |
No |
The Dreamcast Is Sucking My Subconscious Mind |
| 6.76 |
1,084 |
2000-11-10 |
0 |
No |
Seaman Is Damn Tasty! |
| 8.77 |
2,548 |
2000-11-11 |
11 |
Yes |
Night-shift Tech Support Is an Abyss of Pure, Screaming Horror |
| 6.91 |
990 |
2000-11-13 |
0 |
No |
This Crap Is Nothing like Fishing on My PC |
| 6.61 |
2,026 |
2000-11-14 |
1 |
No |
Papa! Papa! They Took Away My AK ! |
| 8.08 |
1,831 |
2000-11-15 |
2 |
No |
My 14-Inch Monitor Is a Total Embarassment at LAN Parties |
| 5.60 |
1,200 |
2000-11-16 |
0 |
No |
Very Shortly There Will Be a Down-throwing of Some Sort of Gauntlet-like Object |
| 7.92 |
1,510 |
2000-11-17 |
2 |
No |
Hot Damn! the Ladies' Room Is Open Season! |
| 8.71 |
2,221 |
2000-11-18 |
3 |
Yes |
Good Morning Small Children. I'm Here to Explain to You How the Internet Works. |
| 7.40 |
1,190 |
2000-11-20 |
1 |
No |
It Was as Though the Hand of God Reached Down and Blessed Me Tonight at Palace Park Amusements |
| 6.57 |
2,089 |
2000-11-21 |
4 |
No |
Psst, Would You like to Buy an Everquest Rubicite Breastplate? It Can Be Yours for the Low Low Price of a Single Human Baby. |
| 6.91 |
1,451 |
2000-11-22 |
1 |
No |
The Remote Control Is under My Friend's Girlfriend's Ass |
| 8.48 |
1,570 |
2000-11-23 |
0 |
Yes |
The Daily Victim Thanksgiving Special |
| 4.72 |
996 |
2000-11-27 |
0 |
No |
Oh Man, This Tom Clancy Book Would Make a Crappy Computer Game |
| 5.96 |
1,121 |
2000-11-28 |
0 |
No |
Critics Agree! My New Game Kicks Ass ... or I Will Kick Yours! |
| 8.34 |
1,510 |
2000-11-29 |
1 |
No |
Your Stupid Asheron's Call Addiction Is Causing Me Sperm Retention Headaches |
| 5.07 |
1,178 |
2000-11-30 |
1 |
No |
This New Game Can't Be Any Good -- It Smells All Coconutty |
| 7.64 |
1,496 |
2000-12-01 |
1 |
No |
Tell Me about Your Day, Honey. I Promise Not to Fall Asleep This Time. |
| 7.70 |
1,495 |
2000-12-02 |
1 |
Yes |
There's Nothing Wrong with Playing Tribes in 200 X 150 Resolution |
| 7.39 |
1,408 |
2000-12-04 |
2 |
No |
The Middle of This End User License Agreement Contains a Freaky Paragraph in All Caps |
| 6.88 |
1,555 |
2000-12-05 |
3 |
No |
I Am a Dance Dance Revolutionary |
| 7.49 |
1,738 |
2000-12-06 |
0 |
No |
My Loss of Self-esteem Can Be Traced Back to the Loss of the Tfc Super Concussion Grenade Jump |
| 6.79 |
1,189 |
2000-12-07 |
0 |
No |
I Can Sum up Your Internet Problems in Three Words My Friend: Girl Scout Modem. |
| 7.35 |
1,183 |
2000-12-08 |
1 |
No |
Many Would Be Stunned or Horrified by the Sight of My "Tribes Hand," but I've Started to Grow Quite Fond of It |
| 7.22 |
981 |
2000-12-09 |
2 |
Yes |
I'm Sorry, Professor, I Can't Attend Your Lectures This Week Due to My Madden 2001 Injury. |
| 7.34 |
1,199 |
2000-12-11 |
0 |
No |
I'm Tellin' Ya, "Rat in a Coke Can" Is Gonna Be the Biggest Internet Phenomena since Deep-fried Chicken Head! |
| 8.19 |
1,534 |
2000-12-12 |
2 |
No |
And Now, Crenshaw, Perhaps You'd like to Explain to Me Why My Favorite Mouse Is Covered in Potato Chip Grease? |
| 6.38 |
1,563 |
2000-12-13 |
0 |
No |
I Swear to God I Am Not Responsible for When They Nerfed the Manastone! |
| 6.45 |
1,673 |
2000-12-14 |
1 |
No |
I Am Right and You Are Wrong, as Evidenced by the Immense Combined Power of the Diablo Characters Listed in My Signature |
| 5.97 |
2,025 |
2000-12-15 |
2 |
No |
Ever since That Last Counter-strike Patch, I Do Everything Akimbo |
| 7.89 |
1,414 |
2000-12-16 |
2 |
Yes |
I Swear to God If You Start Talking about Your Two Handed +3 Cursed Berserking Sword at My Company Christmas Party, I Will Slam You |
| 8.08 |
1,366 |
2000-12-18 |
4 |
No |
I Am the King of Office Ganking! |
| 8.51 |
1,721 |
2000-12-19 |
1 |
No |
Fools! Get Out of Here! a Half-life CD Is on the Loose! |
| 7.39 |
1,192 |
2000-12-20 |
0 |
No |
For God's Sake Get Down! If They See Us Running a Counter-strike Server Here We're Screwed! |
| 7.45 |
1,135 |
2000-12-21 |
2 |
No |
You Call Yourself a Secret Santa!? |
| 7.52 |
1,383 |
2000-12-22 |
3 |
No |
Hot Diggity! This New Matrix Action Figure Sitting on Top of My Monitor Will Affirm My Status as a Badass! |
| 9.13 |
3,493 |
2000-12-23 |
2 |
Yes |
The Daily Victim Christmas Special |
| 6.39 |
1,248 |
2000-12-27 |
0 |
No |
Instead of Helping Me with My Problem, the Dude from Tech Support Took a Screenshot So He Could Show It to All His Friends. |
| 9.04 |
4,278 |
2000-12-28 |
7 |
No |
I Asked for the Quake 3 Expansion for Christmas, but All I Got Was a Stupid Puppy |
| 6.01 |
1,887 |
2000-12-29 |
0 |
No |
Well, I Understand There's No Category for It, but You Have to Admit That This Pig Deserves Some Sort of Prize. |
| 7.17 |
1,217 |
2000-12-30 |
1 |
Yes |
If That Puppy Whizzes in My Yard One More Time I'm Gonna Decapitate Him with a Half-life CD! |
| 5.25 |
1,072 |
2001-01-02 |
0 |
No |
Courage. Honor. Dignity. Respect. These Are the Hallmarks of Clan TF Omega Ops. |
| 7.17 |
1,510 |
2001-01-03 |
1 |
No |
I Recommend You Give Me Your Lunch Money before I Go Down, Down-forward, Forward, Punch. |
| 7.09 |
1,435 |
2001-01-04 |
0 |
No |
I'm Sorry Guys -- *Sniff* -- I Don't Feel Good. I Think I'm Going to Go to School Today Instead of Playing Unreal Tournament. |
| 6.98 |
1,940 |
2001-01-05 |
1 |
No |
Look, I Just Design Websites. I Won't Be Your Girlfriend. |
| 8.21 |
1,742 |
2001-01-06 |
1 |
Yes |
I Have Several Theories as to How a Counter-strike Dedicated Server Managed to Find Its Way into Our Network Closet, Perhaps I Should Elaborate? |
| 6.77 |
1,086 |
2001-01-08 |
0 |
No |
It Takes a Little Tweaking Sometimes, but My Internet Reception Has Gone Way up. |
| 6.63 |
1,221 |
2001-01-09 |
0 |
No |
These Crappy Ice Cubes Melt before the Map Even Changes! |
| 7.56 |
1,592 |
2001-01-10 |
3 |
No |
Mom, Dad, Lay off My Everquest Addiction or I May Be Forced to Move Out of Your Basement. |
| 7.95 |
1,346 |
2001-01-11 |
1 |
No |
C'mon Honey, How Else Am I Supposed to Hear If Someone Is Sneaking into the Flag Room? |
| 5.70 |
1,459 |
2001-01-12 |
2 |
No |
When It Comes to Online Gaming, I Find That the Mud Community Is the Best Place in Which to Mate with Animals. |
| 8.25 |
1,368 |
2001-01-13 |
0 |
Yes |
'Kay Dad, I Understand the New Puppy Chewed up Your Gel Mouse Wrist-rest, I'm Just Saying There May Be a Logical Explanation |
| 7.71 |
1,752 |
2001-01-15 |
0 |
No |
File Too Long Loading File Bad Not Here Yet Nnrrggmmgkk |
| 6.80 |
1,438 |
2001-01-16 |
0 |
No |
Hmmm... Susan? the People Downstairs Are Definitely Playing the Sims. Yeah ... Yeah I Think They Just Bought a Couch. |
| 7.11 |
1,381 |
2001-01-17 |
0 |
No |
You Want a Piece of Me? You Want a Piece of Me!? I'm Available to Kick Your Ass Anywhere between 3:15 and 3:45 PM PST Today |
| 8.52 |
2,298 |
2001-01-18 |
2 |
No |
California's Rolling Power Blackouts Have Reduced Me to Wholly Unsatisfying Forms of Manual Analog Entertainment |
| 7.00 |
1,512 |
2001-01-19 |
0 |
No |
Impossible! How Could He Possibly Have Killed Me? My Bunny Hopping Was Flawless in Both Planning and Execution! |
| 8.16 |
1,736 |
2001-01-20 |
1 |
Yes |
You Want to Talk Surround Sound? Why Stop at 5.1? I've Got an 8.6 Speaker System |
| 7.53 |
1,252 |
2001-01-22 |
0 |
No |
And Bob, Next Door? Camper. S'true! I Saw It! |
| 7.25 |
1,226 |
2001-01-23 |
0 |
No |
That "Tomb Invader" Woman Needs a Good Swift Caning! |
| 8.66 |
1,659 |
2001-01-24 |
2 |
No |
You Understand, I Lost My Pants on a Worms Armageddon Bet. It Was Foolish, but I Had the Sheep, and Thought I Could Do No Wrong. |
| 7.96 |
1,387 |
2001-01-25 |
1 |
No |
This Fancy-schmancy Office Chair Is a Killer of Men and Destroyer of Souls! |
| 8.17 |
1,955 |
2001-01-26 |
4 |
No |
Hello, and Welcome to Gaming Gigabuys. Kill Me. |
| 7.99 |
1,132 |
2001-01-27 |
0 |
No |
California Power Blackouts Continue. the Search for Non-digital Entertainment Grows Desperate. |
| 7.70 |
1,302 |
2001-01-29 |
0 |
No |
There's a New Rules Marshall on This Here Baldur's Gate Server |
| 8.40 |
2,292 |
2001-01-30 |
1 |
No |
Mock Ye the Arcane Arts of Unix Server Administration!? |
| 8.27 |
1,649 |
2001-01-31 |
3 |
No |
I Don't Think the Job Interview Went Well |
| 7.22 |
1,471 |
2001-02-01 |
1 |
No |
There's a Broadsword Embedded in the Entertainment Center? Quick, Hand It Back! I'm Fighting Claw Vipers! |
| 7.53 |
1,285 |
2001-02-02 |
0 |
No |
You'll Have to Pardon Thomas. This Morning He Had to Dismantle and Reassemble His PC, and All He Had Was a Butter Knife. |
| 8.34 |
1,376 |
2001-02-03 |
0 |
Yes |
There's a Perfectly Legitimate Business Reason I Stormed into the Quarterly Fiscal Review Half-naked and Reeking of Alcohol |
| 8.03 |
1,667 |
2001-02-05 |
1 |
No |
I'm Not Naked in Real Life, but I Play a Naked Person on My PC. |
| 7.51 |
1,628 |
2001-02-06 |
0 |
No |
I'm Not Going to Say You Were "0WNED" by My Baby Daughter, Exactly, but She Did Dominate You in a Decisive Manner. |
| 8.16 |
1,203 |
2001-02-07 |
1 |
No |
What!? You're Turning the Mens' Room Back into a Ladies' Room Again? Good God Man, You Can't Let Them Back in There! |
| 6.70 |
2,228 |
2001-02-08 |
1 |
No |
I Will Kick Your Scrawny Chess Ass |
| 6.53 |
1,546 |
2001-02-09 |
2 |
No |
How Do I Win All My LAN Parties? I Credit the Sauce! |
| 9.11 |
5,204 |
2001-02-10 |
10 |
Yes |
Woe, I Say, Woe upon Thee Who Trifle with the Devine Server Administrator! |
| 7.09 |
1,605 |
2001-02-12 |
0 |
No |
I Can't for the Life of Me Figure Out *Slurp* the Reason My Keyboard Is So Sticky |
| 7.10 |
1,252 |
2001-02-13 |
0 |
No |
If They Can Plop a Robot Probe on a Hunk of Rock a Million Miles Away from Earth, Why Can't They Invent a Fallout:tactics Demo That Downloads Faster? |
| 7.78 |
1,670 |
2001-02-14 |
1 |
No |
No No, Pikapuppy, I Don't Choose You! |
| 9.08 |
3,723 |
2001-02-15 |
3 |
No |
That Creep Crenshaw Always Turns the Air Conditioner on Just before Our 5:30 Deathmatch |
| 7.81 |
1,469 |
2001-02-16 |
0 |
No |
C'moff It! That State Trooper Was Totally Camping the Intersection! |
| 8.33 |
1,268 |
2001-02-17 |
0 |
Yes |
My Ingenious Plan to Win the Instagib Match by Re-routing the Air Conditioners Has Backfired |
| 6.32 |
1,345 |
2001-02-19 |
2 |
No |
Hey! That Was My Foot! That Was My Fury! |
| 7.58 |
1,503 |
2001-02-20 |
0 |
No |
Gronk Job -- Put PC Speakers into Cardboard Box. |
| 5.94 |
1,263 |
2001-02-21 |
1 |
No |
This Is from My New Album: I'm Going to Rip Open Your Stomach and Devour the Partially Digested Contents |
| 8.47 |
1,315 |
2001-02-22 |
1 |
No |
If Tribes 2 Is Delayed Again, I Will Rip My Own Face off |
| 7.85 |
1,348 |
2001-02-23 |
0 |
No |
I Have a Dream. |
| 8.08 |
1,284 |
2001-02-24 |
0 |
No |
Daily Victim: Kung Fu Theatre |
| 8.04 |
1,485 |
2001-02-26 |
0 |
No |
My Resolution Is So High That I Can't See the Bomb in Counter-strike |
| 7.85 |
1,367 |
2001-02-27 |
0 |
No |
I Find Myself Crippled with Paralyzing Fear Whenever I Try to Climb Down a Ladder in an FPS Game |
| 8.08 |
1,484 |
2001-02-28 |
0 |
No |
Dad Says His New Dragonslayer +9 Is like the Son He Never Had |
| 8.40 |
1,892 |
2001-03-01 |
2 |
No |
I Have Sewn the Seeds of Mass Hysteria on My Unreal Tournament Server! |
| 4.73 |
1,809 |
2001-03-02 |
1 |
No |
Watch Me Now as I Sing along with the Deus Ex Theme! |
| 7.59 |
1,080 |
2001-03-03 |
1 |
Yes |
Thank You for the Cards and Letters I Received regarding the Alien Popping Out of My Stomach |
| 7.27 |
1,273 |
2001-03-05 |
0 |
No |
We Have to Cross Out 'Fun,' It Just Didn't Fit in with Our New Game's Business Model |
| 6.81 |
1,061 |
2001-03-06 |
1 |
No |
AK, Jes, I See Fortunes from Za Gibs |
| 6.93 |
1,317 |
2001-03-07 |
0 |
No |
Someone Moved the Little Plastic Indian That Was Standing on Top of My Monitor |
| 7.82 |
1,311 |
2001-03-08 |
1 |
No |
Dude, Never Comment on Another Woman's Mags in Front of Your Wife |
| 7.88 |
1,630 |
2001-03-09 |
1 |
No |
Yeeaahhh, This Uh, 'Chip' the Guy Sold You to Play Pirate Games on Your Playstation ... Is a Potato Chip. |
| 8.87 |
2,058 |
2001-03-10 |
0 |
Yes |
Players Have Yet to Discover That I Intentionally Set up My Unreal Tournament Server to Kill Them All in Embarassing Ways! |
| 7.65 |
1,824 |
2001-03-12 |
0 |
No |
I Have to Pee but I Can't Leave My PC Because I Really like the Next Map |
| 7.89 |
2,058 |
2001-03-13 |
2 |
No |
No Photography Allowed into the Microsoft Gamestock Event? We'll See about That... |
| 8.21 |
1,523 |
2001-03-15 |
1 |
No |
No -- No Way Man -- Keep That Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo Away from Me! I Have a Chemistry Exam Tomorrow! |
| 6.58 |
1,280 |
2001-03-16 |
2 |
No |
Want to Know How I Scored 4 Million in One Round of Tony Hawk? Simple. I Waxed My Hands. |
| 8.12 |
1,385 |
2001-03-17 |
0 |
Yes |
I Made the Mistake of Telling My Wife That I Think the Dungeon Siege Farmer Chick Is Hot. |
| 7.07 |
1,153 |
2001-03-19 |
0 |
No |
I Had a Very Harrowing Atari Pitfall Experience as a Small Child. |
| 8.23 |
1,505 |
2001-03-20 |
0 |
No |
Back off! I Have a Stapler! |
| 7.56 |
1,302 |
2001-03-21 |
1 |
No |
Hasbro Has Filed an Injunction against My Punk Rock Band, 'the Frogger Gods.' |
| 7.09 |
1,396 |
2001-03-22 |
0 |
No |
Reactions Were Mixed When I Came Back from Lunch and Started Biting Ankles |
| 8.16 |
1,476 |
2001-03-23 |
1 |
No |
I Trained My Monkey to Squeal Whenever Someone Takes Our Flag |
| 7.68 |
1,440 |
2001-03-24 |
0 |
Yes |
No, No -- Put That Metal Gear Solid 2 Demo Away! It'll Suck Your Soul! |
| 8.02 |
1,561 |
2001-03-26 |
0 |
No |
Today Me and Mr. Stuffnfluf Will Show You How to Correctly Assault Counter-strike's Cs_militia Map |
| 7.87 |
1,547 |
2001-03-27 |
0 |
No |
How Could All Twelve of You Guys Buy Me the Exact Same Game for My Birthday? Don't You Ever Talk? |
| 8.54 |
2,087 |
2001-03-28 |
1 |
No |
Hi. I'm Mike. I'm a Saveaholic. |
| 8.54 |
2,614 |
2001-03-29 |
1 |
No |
No Cringer, You Sniveling Whore, You're Supposed to Eat the Villagers! |
| 7.17 |
2,237 |
2001-03-30 |
0 |
No |
Why Doesn't This Warez Server Have Any Decent Customer Support!? |
| 8.31 |
1,771 |
2001-03-31 |
1 |
Yes |
I Spent Weeks Training My Monkey to Be the First to Grab Tribes 2 at the Store, but Things Went Oh So Very Wrong |
| 7.02 |
1,534 |
2001-04-02 |
0 |
No |
My Greatest Website Hack of All Time, and Everyone Thought It Was an April Fools Joke |
| 7.40 |
1,419 |
2001-04-03 |
1 |
No |
With My New Geforce 3 I Can Run Seti@home Even While Playing Sacrifice |
| 5.55 |
1,625 |
2001-04-04 |
0 |
No |
'While Mr.scales Remains Undefeated in C&C Tournament Play, I'm Afraid He Remains Unavailable for Comment.' |
| 8.35 |
1,860 |
2001-04-05 |
1 |
No |
Kids, You See Mr. Happy Snake? You Leave Mr. Happy Snake inside the Wall or Daddy Gets Very Angry! |
| 7.41 |
1,706 |
2001-04-06 |
0 |
No |
Dude, You Really Can't Complain about Player-killing When You Join a Diablo 2 Server Named 'Kill Kill PVP Mad Duelz I Will Own J00' |
| 8.03 |
1,872 |
2001-04-07 |
2 |
Yes |
Games That Have Only Limited Supplies of Ammo, but Let Me Quicksave, Might as Well Just Give Me Unlimited Ammo. |
| 7.52 |
1,428 |
2001-04-09 |
0 |
No |
Friend, Consider These Money-saving Tips |
| 7.56 |
1,581 |
2001-04-10 |
1 |
No |
I Simply Refuse to Play Any Game That Cannot Correctly Calculate the Muzzle Velocity of a German Panzer IV's 75MM Main Gun. |
| 7.94 |
1,509 |
2001-04-11 |
0 |
No |
Are You a Wargamer or Some Kind of Communist!? |
| 8.34 |
1,409 |
2001-04-12 |
2 |
No |
Failure to Blink During an Intense Game of Tribes 2 Has Hardened My Contact Lenses beyond Repair |
| 8.81 |
1,857 |
2001-04-13 |
1 |
Yes |
The Daily Victim Easter Special |
| 7.83 |
1,563 |
2001-04-17 |
0 |
No |
Damn My Fat, Fat Fingers! |
| 7.26 |
1,381 |
2001-04-18 |
0 |
No |
Having Played Crazy Taxi for Six Straight Hours I Cannot Control the Urge to Drive Dangerously Fast to the Nearest Kentucky Fried Chicken |
| 8.65 |
2,617 |
2001-04-19 |
2 |
No |
Mr. Henderson, I Take Issue with Your Most Recent Thesis, Entitled 'C1V1L W4R: 4 7URN1NG P01N7 1N 4M3R1C4N H1S70RY' |
| 7.04 |
1,405 |
2001-04-20 |
1 |
No |
I'm All Good with Us Buying Out Another Company, but I Take Issue with the Amount of Salmon Jerky We Acquired as Part of the Deal. |
| 7.97 |
2,049 |
2001-04-21 |
0 |
Yes |
Kids, I Think It's Very Important You Understand That Daddy's Network Cable Is Not to Be Used to Pull Your Razer Scooter Out of a Mud Puddle. |
| 7.99 |
2,614 |
2001-04-23 |
0 |
No |
My Girlfriend Manifests Her Dissatisfaction with Our Relationship by Placing Me in an Enormous Mound of Poop. |
| 7.57 |
2,891 |
2001-04-24 |
0 |
No |
In Retrospect It Was a Bad Idea to Mercillesly Taunt That Asheron's Call Admin |
| 6.60 |
1,432 |
2001-04-25 |
0 |
No |
Good Hygiene Is Important When You and Your Roommate Share PC Microphones |
| 6.85 |
1,552 |
2001-04-26 |
1 |
No |
Sherry and I Bought a PS2 Together. That's a Pretty Serious Step! |
| 8.79 |
1,899 |
2001-04-27 |
3 |
No |
These Freakish Puzzle Games Bring Me No Delight Whatsoever! |
| 8.76 |
2,765 |
2001-04-28 |
0 |
Yes |
Mr. Jacobson, You Need to Spend More Time Researching Your Papers and Less Time Playing Tribes 2. Furthermore, You Have No Jetpack Skillz. |
| 7.88 |
1,433 |
2001-04-30 |
0 |
No |
Please! Wear Headphones When You Play Tribes 2 -- You're Ruining Godfather Night! |
| 7.41 |
1,449 |
2001-05-01 |
0 |
No |
You Kids Wouldn't Happen to Know Why Our Swimming Pool Is Empty and Covered with Skate-board Marks, Would You? |
| 7.36 |
1,538 |
2001-05-02 |
1 |
No |
Excuse Me, Sir, You Failed to Signal before Crashing That Bomber into a Mountain. |
| 8.24 |
2,233 |
2001-05-03 |
2 |
No |
I Put the 'Ow' in 'Low Ping' |
| 6.60 |
1,590 |
2001-05-04 |
0 |
No |
Wow, a Whole Quarter. What Shall I Spend It on? a Driving Game, a Fighting Game, or a Light Gun Game? |
| 8.49 |
1,880 |
2001-05-05 |
0 |
Yes |
Gamers like Myself Are Often Inconsiderate of Our Friends' Feelings, Particularly When We Destroy Them. |
| 5.35 |
1,754 |
2001-05-07 |
0 |
No |
Getting Those Tiny CD Headphones Lodged in My Ear Wasn't the Worst Part of My Day... |
| 9.16 |
8,236 |
2001-05-08 |
3 |
No |
As an Arcade Attendant of Five Years, I Can Say with Certainty That Creeping Horror Is Not a Usual Fixture of Palace Park Amusements. |
| 7.35 |
1,818 |
2001-05-09 |
0 |
No |
Stop Destroying My Base! Only the Innocents Remain! |
| 8.35 |
1,654 |
2001-05-10 |
0 |
No |
My New CPU Fan Makes Noises That Only Dogs Can Hear |
| 7.55 |
1,346 |
2001-05-11 |
0 |
No |
Notes on the Proper Use of Homing Pigeons for Counter-strike Combat |
| 9.09 |
3,822 |
2001-05-12 |
1 |
Yes |
My Ping Is Tingling! Trouble Is Afoot! |
| 8.58 |
2,135 |
2001-05-14 |
1 |
No |
It Is Dangerous to Bathe During an Everquest Game |
| 7.35 |
1,615 |
2001-05-15 |
0 |
No |
I Finally Solved Goonies 2 for the NES! |
| 6.91 |
1,092 |
2001-05-16 |
0 |
No |
His Preparation for the Upcoming Tournament Involves a Solid Hour of Meat Beat Manifesto. |
| 7.83 |
1,726 |
2001-05-17 |
0 |
No |
Quick Naps in between Map-changes and Respawns Enable the Skilled Gamer to Play CTF for 48 Straight Hours |
| 5.84 |
1,218 |
2001-05-18 |
0 |
No |
I Am Tired of the Media Portraying Those of Us Who Dress Freakish and Wierd as Freaks and Weirdos. |
| 7.63 |
1,968 |
2001-05-19 |
2 |
Yes |
My Secret N1NJ4 Mission to E3 Was a Dismal Failure |
| 7.79 |
1,664 |
2001-05-21 |
1 |
No |
Seriously, Some Kid's Head Actually Popped When He Saw Star Wars Galaxies. |
| 7.98 |
1,246 |
2001-05-22 |
0 |
No |
I Am Trapped in the Ass End of a Hellish Excuse for a Gaming Convention |
| 8.42 |
1,656 |
2001-05-23 |
1 |
No |
This Whole E3 Gaming Convention Is a Hostile Environment for Gruff the Learning Dog. |
| 8.02 |
1,529 |
2001-05-24 |
1 |
No |
What Salon.com Fails to Realize Is That I Dressed like a Pimp Long before I Became a Game Developer |
| 8.59 |
2,284 |
2001-05-25 |
1 |
No |
I Refused to Allow My Broken Arm to Hinder My Deathmatch Skillz |
| 8.45 |
1,944 |
2001-05-26 |
1 |
Yes |
This Weekend's Tribute to the Armed Forces Will Take Place in My Bathtub. |
| 8.13 |
1,640 |
2001-05-29 |
2 |
No |
Give Charlie a Chance to Cool Down -- for the Last Six Weeks He's Had a Hootie and the Blowfish CD Jammed in His Dreamcast |
| 7.88 |
1,817 |
2001-05-30 |
0 |
No |
To Get My Husband off of the Computer, I Had to Fake Not Having a Headache |
| 6.19 |
1,252 |
2001-05-31 |
1 |
No |
Gentlemen, This New 'X-treme' Game Concept Will Leave You Piddling Your Boxers with Joy. |
| 5.71 |
1,272 |
2001-06-01 |
0 |
No |
Forget Everything You've Heard, I Have the X-treme Game of the Future |
| 8.86 |
1,894 |
2001-06-03 |
0 |
Yes |
My Arch Gaming Nemisis Was in a Body Cast, Yet He Still Talked Smack |
| 6.59 |
1,290 |
2001-06-04 |
0 |
No |
Sherry's Magnetic Poetry Is Becoming Increasingly Violent towards Our PS2 |
| 7.56 |
1,528 |
2001-06-05 |
1 |
No |
My Neverwinter Nights Server Is Just Going to Be a Place for Characters to Get Drunk and Party |
| 8.58 |
1,826 |
2001-06-06 |
1 |
No |
Oh Man. Today a High School Kid Is Going to Shadow Me for 'Career Day,' So I Have to Pretend to Work |
| 8.30 |
1,627 |
2001-06-07 |
0 |
No |
These Coin-operated Web Servers Were a Bad Idea |
| 8.08 |
1,908 |
2001-06-08 |
1 |
No |
Jim Always Plays the Wermacht in WWII Games |
| 7.89 |
1,505 |
2001-06-09 |
0 |
Yes |
We Had an Incredibly Sordid Experience Removing the Hootie and the Blowfish CD from Charlie's Dreamcast |
| 7.79 |
1,589 |
2001-06-11 |
0 |
No |
Sorry Guys, I Can't Play in Our Tribes Match Tonight. I'm Temporarily Unable to Use the Mouse and Keyboard at the Same Time. |
| 7.38 |
1,367 |
2001-06-12 |
0 |
No |
Well Guys, after All Four of Us Bought Gameboy Advance, We've No Money Left for Food and Nothing to Eat but a Solid Brick of Velveeta Cheese. |
| 7.32 |
1,471 |
2001-06-13 |
1 |
No |
Welcome to Tony Scirocco's Online Macdown |
| 8.40 |
2,735 |
2001-06-14 |
1 |
No |
I Would Never Date a Man Who Builds a Havoc Heavy Transport and Then Takes off with Two Empty Seats |
| 8.13 |
2,483 |
2001-06-15 |
2 |
No |
An Extremely Talented Individual -- like Myself -- Can Eat an Entire Hot Dog During the Loading Screen of an SSX Map |
| 7.02 |
1,281 |
2001-06-18 |
0 |
No |
It's a Damn Shame What They Did to That Fourth Pac-man Ghost |
| 6.80 |
1,620 |
2001-06-19 |
0 |
No |
Nothing Says Whacky Online Fun like a Flashbang in the Face of a Teammate! Ho Ho Ho! |
| 8.21 |
1,859 |
2001-06-20 |
0 |
No |
I Pre-ordered an X-BOX, and That's When the Bad Things Happened. |
| 6.37 |
1,521 |
2001-06-21 |
1 |
No |
I Have Seen All Three Screenshots for This New Game That Was Just Announced and Lemme Tell You How Bad It's Going to Suck. |
| 8.59 |
1,768 |
2001-06-22 |
1 |
No |
The Best Birthday Present I Ever Got? a Roll of Quarters. |
| 8.19 |
2,517 |
2001-06-23 |
0 |
Yes |
My Ex-boyfriend Plays for the Other Team |
| 7.67 |
1,700 |
2001-06-25 |
0 |
No |
I Wish They'd Stop Coming Out with Genre-busting Video Games -- It's Ruining My Whole Filing Scheme. |
| 6.42 |
1,220 |
2001-06-26 |
2 |
No |
The Secret to 4X4 Evolution, My Son, Is to Become One with the Road. |
| 7.04 |
1,486 |
2001-06-27 |
1 |
No |
Silence! Game Designer Derek Smart'S Name Must Only Be Spoken in Hushed Tones |
| 6.95 |
1,431 |
2001-06-28 |
0 |
No |
My Father Came Back from the Grave with an Important Announcement |
| 7.95 |
1,423 |
2001-06-29 |
0 |
No |
Sure, Sure Yeh, My Wife's a Better Sniper than Me. but I'm Still the Flag-runner of This Household. |
| 8.63 |
1,794 |
2001-06-30 |
1 |
Yes |
My Adoration of the Atari 2600 Knew No Limits ... until Yesterday. |
| 7.28 |
1,400 |
2001-07-02 |
0 |
No |
Please, Distract My Fiance While I Sneak a PS2 onto Our Wedding Gift Registry |
| 8.68 |
1,534 |
2001-07-03 |
1 |
No |
I'm Addicted to Teamfortress Hallucinogen Grenades |
| 6.50 |
1,355 |
2001-07-04 |
0 |
No |
This Game You Bought Me Isn't SSX. and You're Not My Real Mom. |
| 7.22 |
1,303 |
2001-07-05 |
1 |
No |
Stella, No! You Push Down to Crouch, Then Press High-punch to Uppercut! |
| 6.23 |
1,453 |
2001-07-06 |
0 |
No |
My Approach to Playing Light Gun Games Is One-part Tj Hooker, One Part MTV's Jackass |
| 8.42 |
1,340 |
2001-07-07 |
0 |
Yes |
Many Games Undergoing Beta-testing Fail to Acknowledge the Valuable Wisdom Hardcore Gamers Can Give |
| 8.02 |
1,652 |
2001-07-09 |
1 |
No |
Whenever I Talk with Max, It Feels like One of Us Is Lagging |
| 5.79 |
1,696 |
2001-07-10 |
0 |
No |
My Parents Opted for a 'Poor Man's' Net-nanny System |
| 8.75 |
1,976 |
2001-07-11 |
1 |
No |
Your Keen Skills at Setting up Base Defenses Are No Match for My Ability to Crash a Vehicle into Them |
| 6.48 |
1,314 |
2001-07-12 |
0 |
No |
Boxes That Make Noise and React to Me When I Push Buttons -- That's All I Need to Be Happy. |
| 8.33 |
1,599 |
2001-07-13 |
0 |
No |
My Tribes Game Was Destroyed by an Errant Car Alarm |
| 8.23 |
1,274 |
2001-07-14 |
0 |
Yes |
My Clan Forced Me into the Grenade Clinic |
| 8.02 |
1,484 |
2001-07-16 |
0 |
No |
How Can I Possibly Use the Keyboard to Play Games When the Cartoonist Only Gives Me Four Fingers? |
| 8.37 |
1,713 |
2001-07-17 |
2 |
No |
Son, It's Time We Talked about the Bases and the Bees... |
| 7.51 |
1,398 |
2001-07-18 |
0 |
No |
National Security Reasons Demand That These 'Punkbuster' Workarounds Do Not Fall into Enemy Hands |
| 6.77 |
1,242 |
2001-07-19 |
0 |
No |
Look, Your Software Store Stopped Carrying Codename Eagle. We Decided to Take Drastic Measures. |
| 5.60 |
1,539 |
2001-07-20 |
0 |
No |
You Haven't Really Entered the Game Development Community until You Own a Pair of Battery-operated Pants |
| 9.08 |
3,204 |
2001-07-22 |
0 |
Yes |
My Reign as the Most Effective Tribes 2 Suicide Pilot Was Traumatically Cut Short When I Lived for over Five Consecutive Minutes |
| 6.83 |
988 |
2001-07-23 |
5 |
No |
If My Missing PS2 Memory Card Does Not Resurface, I'm Going to Order a Full-on Pants Drop |
| 7.80 |
935 |
2001-07-24 |
5 |
No |
I Will Win ... the Beetle Cup |
| 7.88 |
890 |
2001-07-25 |
2 |
No |
Your Skill at 'Racing' Pales in Comparison to My Targeted High-speed Demolition Tactics |
| 6.88 |
926 |
2001-07-26 |
3 |
No |
Are You Kidding Me? This Drives Nothing like My Dodge Viper |
| 7.94 |
811 |
2001-07-27 |
1 |
No |
I Ask That, before You Use My 1000-Watt Simulated Racing Seat, You Please Use the Potty. |
| 9.07 |
2,341 |
2001-07-28 |
0 |
Yes |
I Had Nothing to Do with the Hellish Fury That Followed the Gran Turismo 3 Tournament |
| 7.41 |
1,287 |
2001-07-30 |
0 |
No |
'Enjoy' My Vacation? Lemme Tell You Something about Cruise Ships: No Cable Modems |
| 6.57 |
1,223 |
2001-07-31 |
0 |
No |
My Winning Counter-strike Strategy: a Two-pronged Attack of Both Tai-chi and Mouse Sensitivity |
| 7.08 |
1,318 |
2001-08-01 |
0 |
No |
Dad Plugged in the Hairdryer Two Hours into the Daytona 500 and Blew My Whole PC |
| 7.19 |
1,592 |
2001-08-02 |
0 |
No |
From Hell's Heart I Stab at Thee, for Hate's Sake I Spit My Last Dodgeball at Thee |
| 7.61 |
1,331 |
2001-08-03 |
1 |
No |
It's Your Turn to Clean the Fridge, and Might I Remind You You're One Snip Away from Complete Dsl Blackout! |
| 7.67 |
1,492 |
2001-08-04 |
0 |
Yes |
Son, Adults Learn to Share the Havoc Heavy Transport |
| 6.31 |
1,237 |
2001-08-06 |
1 |
No |
Tell Ma I Done Gone to Austin to Be a Rich and Famous Game Developer |
| 4.84 |
1,538 |
2001-08-07 |
0 |
No |
Just One Nibble and Them Hedgehogs Will Know the Meaning of 'Pain.' |
| 6.98 |
1,469 |
2001-08-08 |
0 |
No |
Fine, Date My Little Sister. Just Don't Expect Me to Defuse the Bomb for You Anymore! |
| 6.91 |
1,337 |
2001-08-09 |
0 |
No |
Dude, You Just Optomize This Yo-yo and You'd Get Twice the Rebound and 40% Better Spin |
| 8.16 |
1,799 |
2001-08-10 |
2 |
No |
I Remind You That I and I Alone Have the Power |
| 8.08 |
2,247 |
2001-08-11 |
1 |
Yes |
Egah! What Have I Done? |
| 5.10 |
875 |
2001-08-13 |
0 |
No |
Gads! Will Ye Robber Barons Ever Layoff of Mine Union Pacific Railroad? |
| 7.12 |
1,506 |
2001-08-14 |
0 |
No |
Your Game Needs More Near-nudity |
| 8.36 |
1,610 |
2001-08-15 |
0 |
No |
His Identity Remains a Mystery, but the Legend Has Only Begun |
| 9.43 |
15,916 |
2001-08-16 |
2 |
No |
Our New Office Passtime Is Messin' with the Guy Who Plays Majestic |
| 5.30 |
2,018 |
2001-08-17 |
0 |
No |
Look Out! He's Using the Big Mouse! |
| 9.03 |
2,766 |
2001-08-18 |
2 |
Yes |
Those Fewls Insist I Abandon the Glove and the Dark Feedback-forcing Arts It Embodies |
| 8.12 |
2,261 |
2001-08-20 |
1 |
No |
I Solicited Spam Mail to Stop the Lonliness |
| 6.85 |
1,362 |
2001-08-21 |
0 |
No |
One Game of Nine-ball Is All It Takes for Me to Reduce a Human Being to a Shrieking Mass of Infantile Garbage |
| 7.62 |
1,784 |
2001-08-22 |
0 |
No |
You Only Love Me Because of My Unreal Tournament Skills! and Because I Have a Great Body. |
| 6.21 |
1,022 |
2001-08-23 |
0 |
No |
I Was Victimized by My Star Wars Galaxies Player Association |
| 6.33 |
1,208 |
2001-08-24 |
0 |
No |
I Killed for the Motor City Online Beta |
| 9.16 |
5,528 |
2001-08-25 |
0 |
No |
Messing with People Who Play Majestic Is Probably a Really Bad Idea |
| 6.11 |
1,420 |
2001-08-27 |
3 |
No |
Want to Trade Your Fungus Covered Scale Tunic? I Can Offer You a Human Baby in Return. |
| 7.61 |
1,540 |
2001-08-28 |
1 |
No |
The End User License Agreement Provided No Protection for My Ovaries |
| 6.20 |
1,227 |
2001-08-29 |
0 |
No |
Ahhh, the Forces of Terror Are Again at Bay. at Least until the Next Round Starts. |
| 8.25 |
2,294 |
2001-08-30 |
1 |
No |
Thanks to Unreal Tournament, I Was Kicked Out of the S.A.t. Exams |
| 7.23 |
1,144 |
2001-08-31 |
0 |
No |
I Found a New Game Setup That Helps Compensate for My Attention Deficit Disorder |
| 7.87 |
1,532 |
2001-09-01 |
0 |
Yes |
Spam Mail Is the Only Fulfilling Thing in My Life |
| 7.43 |
1,410 |
2001-09-03 |
0 |
No |
Crack Soldier of Fortune, Reporting for Duty Sir! |
| 6.83 |
1,267 |
2001-09-04 |
0 |
No |
This Indiana Jones Pinball Game Ate My Balls! |
| 6.63 |
1,696 |
2001-09-05 |
0 |
No |
Explain to Me Again Why Inverting Your Mouselook Is a Good Thing? |
| 5.37 |
1,335 |
2001-09-06 |
0 |
No |
If You Guys Had Just Talked to Me before You Released Arcanum... |
| 9.11 |
2,765 |
2001-09-07 |
0 |
No |
Despite All Efforts My Pet Cow Has Completed a Long Slow Harrowing Descent into Depravity |
| 8.27 |
2,307 |
2001-09-08 |
0 |
Yes |
Unreal Tournament Got Me into College |
| 7.42 |
1,136 |
2001-09-10 |
0 |
No |
The Tireless Work of Men like Me Keeps Atari's 'E.t.' from Falling into the Wrong Hands |
| 6.27 |
1,623 |
2001-09-11 |
0 |
No |
First My Gut! Will My Tribes Skillz Be Next? |
| 5.27 |
1,161 |
2001-09-14 |
3 |
No |
The Search for a New Daily Victim Artist Begins |
| 6.34 |
816 |
2001-09-17 |
0 |
No |
The Search Continues |
| 5.54 |
989 |
2001-09-19 |
0 |
No |
A New Daily Victim Artist Is on the Horizon ... Sadly, Not Here. |
| 5.28 |
2,300 |
2001-09-25 |
1 |
No |
Find an Artist? Hell, I Need to Find a Lawyer! |
| 6.47 |
655 |
2002-01-16 |
0 |
No |
If They Bring Back the Daily Victim, I Promise -- I'll Wax More than My Hands |
| 7.61 |
444 |
2002-02-12 |
0 |
No |
The Daily Victim Returns March 1, 2002! |
| 6.16 |
2,266 |
2002-03-01 |
4 |
No |
The World Conspires to Keep 'State of Emergency' Out of My Innocent, Childlike Hands |
| 7.62 |
2,038 |
2002-03-02 |
0 |
Yes |
The Secret to My Artistic Success Lies Not from Being the Man, but in Pretending That I'm Being the Man |
| 6.96 |
1,764 |
2002-03-04 |
3 |
No |
This Weekend My Friend Kip Taught Me All about Starting Mall Riots |
| 7.60 |
2,805 |
2002-03-05 |
3 |
No |
In Hindsight, Camping outside the Software Store in Anticipation of Teamfortress 2 Was Probably a Bad Idea. |
| 6.73 |
1,499 |
2002-03-06 |
1 |
No |
Son, You're Not Thinking of Fighting the Powah, Are You? |
| 8.26 |
2,189 |
2002-03-07 |
2 |
No |
Not Even God Himself Can Defeat My Empire Earth Scenario! |
| 7.32 |
1,217 |
2002-03-08 |
1 |
No |
I'm the Last Line of Defense between America's Youth and the Destabilizing Influence of Such Subversive Games as WWF Raw |
| 8.71 |
1,835 |
2002-03-09 |
4 |
Yes |
You Got to Fight for Your Right to Play 'M' Rated Games! Testify! |
| 6.69 |
2,429 |
2002-03-11 |
0 |
No |
Baby, I Put the ‘Romance’ in ‘Necromancer’ |
| 8.49 |
2,629 |
2002-03-12 |
1 |
No |
Sir, I Really Think It's a Bad Idea to Call Our New 3D Card 'the Geforce 5 Mi-A55' |
| 6.99 |
1,651 |
2002-03-13 |
1 |
No |
Are you kidding me? The cartoon kitty could totally kick Clippy the Paperclip's ass |
| 7.19 |
2,199 |
2002-03-14 |
1 |
No |
She wants to solve Diablo II together? Are you sure you're ready for that kind of commitment? |
| 8.26 |
1,347 |
2002-03-15 |
0 |
No |
God bless America! In the land of opportunity, scooter-entrepreneurs like myself can score an easy Xbox. |
| 7.59 |
1,804 |
2002-03-16 |
1 |
Yes |
My NEW Empire Earth scenario is more than unbeatable ... it's divinely inspired |
| 5.72 |
1,287 |
2002-03-18 |
0 |
No |
It is man’s ultimate ambition to achieve perfect balance in life, in love, and in Tony Hawk |
| 8.53 |
1,905 |
2002-03-19 |
1 |
No |
Removal of this PS2 controller will require a licensed OBGYN |
| 7.68 |
1,503 |
2002-03-20 |
0 |
No |
Deciphering the damn Jedi Starfighter backstory is like reading the A&E channel |
| 5.67 |
1,067 |
2002-03-21 |
0 |
No |
You're just not playing Xbox football unless they're bringing out the chains |
| 7.01 |
1,460 |
2002-03-22 |
0 |
No |
The secret to good game design is nothing less than soft, sensual, knee-length hair |
| 8.03 |
1,603 |
2002-03-23 |
0 |
Yes |
When you think of high end graphics, I want you to think about Mi-A55. |
| 8.08 |
2,349 |
2002-03-25 |
1 |
No |
Wooo-hooo! You were my one-millionth player kill! |
| 6.96 |
1,683 |
2002-03-26 |
0 |
No |
Stop! Don’t move an inch! My Super Mario Advance cartridge is lost somewhere in the shag carpet. |
| 7.18 |
1,757 |
2002-03-27 |
0 |
No |
I’m gonna whomp you so hard, they might as well cue the sad French horns. |
| 7.53 |
1,882 |
2002-03-28 |
0 |
No |
I lost 30 gigs of pr0n in that last blackout |
| 8.30 |
1,446 |
2002-03-29 |
2 |
No |
You haven’t really played Virtua Fighter 4 until you’ve busted out the Shaolin style with a fishing controller. |
| 8.46 |
1,963 |
2002-03-30 |
1 |
Yes |
Great care must be taken when removing a PS2 controller from one’s privates |
| 7.02 |
1,540 |
2002-04-01 |
0 |
No |
This base has been in my family for years |
| 9.21 |
7,144 |
2002-04-02 |
3 |
No |
When I forgot my access card this morning, I was forced to go Metal Gear Solid freestyle at the office |
| 7.70 |
2,200 |
2002-04-03 |
1 |
No |
My girlfriend is what you would call a ... "Freedom Forcer." |
| 8.35 |
2,704 |
2002-04-04 |
1 |
No |
I bought an EverQuest Level 43 Barbarian Shaman off of a disreputable auction site ... but at what cost? |
| 5.85 |
1,580 |
2002-04-05 |
0 |
No |
Will these PaRappa chains make me look cool? I gotta believe! |
| 8.53 |
2,300 |
2002-04-06 |
3 |
Yes |
It's amazing the depths of depravity you can explore with a humble PS2 fishing controller |
| 7.52 |
1,916 |
2002-04-08 |
0 |
No |
Thanks to a catastrophic miscalculation regarding daylight savings time, our 60-minute clan match lasted approximately 13.6 seconds. |
| 8.59 |
2,280 |
2002-04-09 |
0 |
No |
Shut up you guys. If there was a "band camp" video game, I'd OWN. |
| 6.86 |
1,671 |
2002-04-10 |
0 |
No |
Gary Gygax appeared to me in a dream last night ... wearing studded leather pants! |
| 7.96 |
1,691 |
2002-04-11 |
0 |
No |
Here on MY server, I like to focus on attractive Dungeon Siege gardening |
| 8.84 |
2,493 |
2002-04-12 |
1 |
No |
A grievous typo on our prom leaflets invited the seniors to 'Bring a Date to the 2002 Pr0n' |
| 9.08 |
2,949 |
2002-04-13 |
0 |
Yes |
There comes a time in every man’s life when he asks himself: What would Solid Snake do? |
| 6.14 |
2,022 |
2002-04-15 |
0 |
No |
Global Operations’ Intel character class allows me to fulfill at long last my natural inclination to command |
| 5.09 |
1,800 |
2002-04-16 |
0 |
No |
It looks like playing Agent Under Fire will have to wait until after "Walkies." |
| 7.53 |
1,798 |
2002-04-17 |
0 |
No |
In regards to the last Krispy Kreme doughnut: |
| 7.68 |
1,654 |
2002-04-18 |
1 |
No |
AN AUDIT!? I knew I shouldn't have let those guys on the forums do my taxes! |
| 8.02 |
1,913 |
2002-04-19 |
1 |
No |
These new smaller PC boxes are great, I can sneak ‘em in the house without my wife seeing |
| 6.68 |
1,762 |
2002-04-20 |
0 |
Yes |
It’s horrifying times like these that a man has to ask himself: What would The Rock do? |
| 6.21 |
1,404 |
2002-04-22 |
0 |
No |
What I need is one of those "kick 'em in the jimmies" lawyers |
| 6.91 |
1,752 |
2002-04-23 |
0 |
No |
You will never defeat my optimal Age of Empires development path! |
| 7.48 |
1,651 |
2002-04-24 |
0 |
No |
Eyah! Stop it! If you keep playing that Spider-Man game you'll ruin the movie! |
| 6.97 |
1,798 |
2002-04-25 |
0 |
No |
Those of us with foresight ensure that our post-apocalyptic survival bunkers are equipped with FilePlanet accounts. |
| 7.66 |
1,734 |
2002-04-26 |
1 |
No |
A word of caution regarding PC cooling fans and chinchillas: |
| 8.69 |
2,327 |
2002-04-27 |
0 |
Yes |
It’s easy to sneak these new, smaller PC game boxes into the house. But that’s not always a good thing. |
| 5.90 |
2,196 |
2002-04-29 |
0 |
No |
I like to both cut AND paste. |
| 8.22 |
2,182 |
2002-04-30 |
0 |
No |
My PC speaker began emitting noises almost wholly unlike "music." |
| 9.13 |
5,715 |
2002-05-01 |
4 |
No |
As a former SysAdmin, I always have a backup plan. |
| 5.94 |
1,889 |
2002-05-02 |
0 |
No |
How do I decide what to buy? The real turning point for me is how quickly a game comes out with a Boba Fett mod. |
| 7.33 |
2,075 |
2002-05-03 |
0 |
No |
Monitor radiation cured my cancer! |
| 7.78 |
1,990 |
2002-05-04 |
0 |
Yes |
Further studies have confirmed that Chinchillas and PC gaming just don't mix. |
| 6.83 |
1,560 |
2002-05-06 |
0 |
No |
Just because you CAN play the Mario theme song with your armpits, doesn't mean you NEED to. |
| 7.73 |
1,983 |
2002-05-07 |
0 |
No |
Mr. Pickles has issues with my new optical mouse. |
| 7.74 |
1,709 |
2002-05-08 |
0 |
No |
Extra extra! Read about it here! 5 slain in briefcase-camping incident! |
| 8.65 |
1,742 |
2002-05-09 |
2 |
No |
The delicious, sizzling scent of barbecue is disrupting my game of Morrowind |
| 7.36 |
1,915 |
2002-05-10 |
1 |
No |
It's sad but true that a hamster's squeaky wheel can drive a gamer to the brink of insanity |
| 9.35 |
8,173 |
2002-05-11 |
6 |
Yes |
Simultaneously attending an EverQuest wedding and a job interview is not a trivial exercise. Fortunately, I always have a backup plan. |
| 5.17 |
1,828 |
2002-05-13 |
0 |
No |
I can end troublesome lens flares Forever! |
| 7.72 |
1,868 |
2002-05-14 |
1 |
No |
I disagree. A broadsword to the head wouldn't hurt if you were wearing good armor. |
| 7.91 |
2,306 |
2002-05-15 |
0 |
No |
Step aside! This Star Wars line is getting out of hand. |
| 8.07 |
1,758 |
2002-05-16 |
0 |
No |
My new boss is a micromanaging narcoleptic |
| 6.94 |
1,658 |
2002-05-17 |
1 |
No |
Professor Lyons of MIT explains how to get Morrowind to work with your 3D card |
| 8.60 |
1,976 |
2002-05-18 |
0 |
Yes |
Morrowind has taught me a valuable life's lesson: How to steal everything that isn't nailed down |
| 6.55 |
2,363 |
2002-05-20 |
0 |
No |
Hear me out -- Our Asheron's Call monarchy would be considerably more powerful with its own clone army. |
| 7.39 |
2,268 |
2002-05-21 |
1 |
No |
Attention Citizens of Morrowind: I Wish to Make Public My Request that You ‘Bring It.’ |
| 6.66 |
2,173 |
2002-05-22 |
0 |
No |
This Nintendo Booth Was Built Atop the Carpeted Remains of Your Forefathers |
| 8.75 |
2,896 |
2002-05-23 |
1 |
No |
My uncanny resemblance to gaming superstar Shigeru Miyamoto encouraged my friends to hatch a nefarious scheme |
| 8.74 |
3,194 |
2002-05-24 |
1 |
No |
This fake Mario costume changed what should've been the happiest day of my life into a howling nightmare of sweat and foam |
| 8.43 |
2,944 |
2002-05-25 |
0 |
Yes |
This whole E3 convention business is like hitting the swag mother lode |
| 5.74 |
2,121 |
2002-05-28 |
0 |
No |
Okay, you run forward, I'll punch the goalie |
| 8.18 |
2,494 |
2002-05-29 |
4 |
No |
My girlfriend kicks my ass at Super Smash Brothers Melee ... using the Princess |
| 7.28 |
2,454 |
2002-05-30 |
2 |
No |
There are two ways to play Super Smash Brothers, my young padawan. There's a light side. And a dark side. |
| 8.47 |
2,507 |
2002-05-31 |
2 |
No |
A woman can't let true love stand in the way of mad skillz. |
| 8.33 |
2,907 |
2002-06-01 |
1 |
No |
Occasionally a man has to throw down for the woman he loves |
| 6.78 |
2,749 |
2002-06-04 |
0 |
No |
Don't kick me off of your game service -- my mom was out of control on here last night |
| 5.93 |
2,453 |
2002-06-05 |
1 |
No |
When Star Wars Galaxies comes out, y'all know where I'm gonna be. |
| 6.55 |
2,158 |
2002-06-06 |
0 |
No |
Top ten things I will do for your Neverwinter Nights beta CD... |
| 8.45 |
2,321 |
2002-06-07 |
1 |
No |
The kid wouldn't step away from the Zero Gunner machine; what's a guy to do? |
| 8.34 |
2,845 |
2002-06-08 |
0 |
Yes |
My Super Smash Bros. skillz have led me on an odyssey to the lowest depths of humanity |
| 8.94 |
2,762 |
2002-06-11 |
1 |
No |
There were disastrous consequences to installing a backlight to my Game Boy Advance |
| 7.17 |
2,241 |
2002-06-12 |
1 |
No |
To fully unlock the mysteries of the Harry Potter DVD, we had to call in Percy |
| 7.52 |
3,009 |
2002-06-13 |
0 |
No |
I swear I saw some Blizzard Programmers eating lunch at El Pollo Loco yesterday |
| 6.83 |
2,293 |
2002-06-14 |
0 |
No |
No way man, she's hot for me! Just LOOK at the emoticons she's using! |
| 7.68 |
2,400 |
2002-06-15 |
0 |
Yes |
I just had the best and worst arcade experience of my life |
| 6.83 |
1,851 |
2002-06-17 |
0 |
No |
Say what? I can't hear you over the miserable howling Jigglypuff cacophony! |
| 6.75 |
1,451 |
2002-06-18 |
0 |
No |
Pilgrimage, we must make, to the world's largest Yoda |
| 5.94 |
1,748 |
2002-06-19 |
0 |
No |
Your new GameSpy design with its giant Jango Fett frightens me |
| 8.26 |
2,024 |
2002-06-20 |
0 |
No |
Note to staff: Please refrain from screaming "FRAWRESS VICTORRRY" whenever important Japanese clients are visting |
| 8.30 |
1,927 |
2002-06-21 |
1 |
No |
The Army has a videogame? Big deal, the 'CIA Black Ops' game has been out for years. In secret. |
| 8.89 |
2,387 |
2002-06-22 |
0 |
Yes |
I was irradiated by a failed Game Boy backlight installation |
| 8.23 |
2,026 |
2002-06-25 |
0 |
No |
We got no choice but to send in Earls. He's the best camper this army's got. |
| 7.68 |
1,583 |
2002-06-26 |
0 |
No |
Val-U-Ware's Virtual Bowler 3D did little to prepare me for the actual bowling experience |
| 7.97 |
1,750 |
2002-06-27 |
1 |
No |
Pirates hacked my webserver ... but they filled it full of Warez! |
| 8.51 |
2,455 |
2002-06-28 |
1 |
No |
I can totally wig out my neighbor's WaveBird with this old cellular phone |
| 7.88 |
1,313 |
2002-06-29 |
0 |
Yes |
An important message from your neighborhood secret operative |
| 8.36 |
2,143 |
2002-07-01 |
2 |
No |
Reporting to you LIVE from the observation mode of Bl00dLu5t's Tribes II server... |
| 7.31 |
1,681 |
2002-07-02 |
0 |
No |
Professor Lyons of MIT explains how Neverwinter scripting works |
| 6.45 |
2,642 |
2002-07-03 |
1 |
No |
Nothing but me, Maxim magazine, and the Neverwinter Nights ad... A night for ROMANCE. |
| 8.14 |
1,961 |
2002-07-04 |
0 |
No |
Whoa, guys, make sure you're not on any fault lines when you light that thing off... |
| 9.03 |
2,010 |
2002-07-06 |
0 |
Yes |
I've only scratched the surface of the power this old cell phone gives me over WaveBird controllers |
| 7.97 |
2,025 |
2002-07-08 |
0 |
No |
Hello, sir! Allow me to demonstrate for you a stunning new way to roleplay without a PC! |
| 8.06 |
2,202 |
2002-07-09 |
0 |
No |
FWWwoooAAAHH! You can get a wicked buzz just by licking the Warcraft III box! |
| 7.44 |
1,672 |
2002-07-10 |
0 |
No |
I probably blew my Nintendo Street Team audition when I threatened to knee-drop Luigi in the balls |
| 7.45 |
1,871 |
2002-07-11 |
0 |
No |
I can't bear to watch you mod that GameCube |
| 8.41 |
2,921 |
2002-07-12 |
0 |
No |
The Littlest Orc: A Bedtime Story |
| 8.49 |
1,818 |
2002-07-13 |
0 |
Yes |
We now return LIVE to the observation mode of Bl00dlu5t's Tribes II server where an amazing feat is soon to transpire |
| 7.86 |
2,829 |
2002-07-15 |
0 |
No |
Listen, mister! This here adventuring party doesn't stoop to "Chaotic" Evil, and we're not about to start. |
| 7.45 |
1,562 |
2002-07-16 |
0 |
No |
After being ordained over the Internet, I feel qualified to conduct an online wedding |
| 6.93 |
1,902 |
2002-07-17 |
0 |
No |
I feel for the peons |
| 9.01 |
2,714 |
2002-07-18 |
1 |
No |
I've blown $240 this past month because the girl on the game tips hotline is hot |
| 8.08 |
1,583 |
2002-07-19 |
6 |
No |
I have a plan for a Neverwinter scenario so incredible it'll melt the skin off of your body! |
| 8.39 |
1,379 |
2002-07-20 |
3 |
Yes |
Our mind-blowing Neverwinter scenario will require days of focused coding in a remote mountain retreat |
| 7.92 |
1,270 |
2002-07-22 |
2 |
No |
Friends, I tell you the truth: Man can't live on Neverwinter alone |
| 8.94 |
1,354 |
2002-07-23 |
2 |
No |
Today our Neverwinter world shall be unleashed to the sycophantic public. My AI is smarter than all of them. |
| 8.72 |
1,652 |
2002-07-24 |
2 |
No |
C'mon, boys. It's time to bust us some roleplayin' freaks. |
| 7.55 |
1,294 |
2002-07-25 |
0 |
No |
Tribute to the Violence Inherent in the System |
| 8.06 |
1,898 |
2002-07-26 |
0 |
No |
Extra! Extra! Read all about it! U.S. President Declares War on Camping! |
| 9.10 |
6,237 |
2002-07-27 |
1 |
Yes |
I tried to dial the WarCraft III tips line, but then things got raunchy |
| 7.42 |
2,049 |
2002-07-29 |
0 |
No |
The 200 pound mouse has done wonders for my upper body strength |
| 8.08 |
1,741 |
2002-07-30 |
0 |
No |
The off-site administrative meeting means I'm in charge of the office. Bust out the Velcro! |
| 8.71 |
2,571 |
2002-07-31 |
1 |
No |
Everything I ever needed to know about Summer Camp I learned from Duke Nukem |
| 6.35 |
1,601 |
2002-08-01 |
0 |
No |
When I asked Craig to get us directions to KFC, I didn't expect him to use Crazi Taxi 3. |
| 7.49 |
1,983 |
2002-08-02 |
0 |
No |
I spent three solid months of my life solving Tony Hawk 3 just to watch a bunch of munchwads play musical chairs!? |
| 8.66 |
1,635 |
2002-08-03 |
0 |
Yes |
Having created the smartest AI to ever grace a computer game, I found it now necessary to bust it out of 'The Joint.' |
| 8.21 |
2,459 |
2002-08-05 |
0 |
No |
McDonald's Play Palace gives me unlimited access to small, easily-beatable Super Smash Bros. opponents |
| 7.78 |
2,212 |
2002-08-06 |
0 |
No |
The most difficult part of sneaking online after dark is muffling the modem |
| 7.59 |
1,272 |
2002-08-07 |
0 |
No |
Kids, there will be no "Super Guinea Pig Ball" in this house. Let me explain. |
| 7.94 |
2,000 |
2002-08-08 |
1 |
No |
Hold the phone guys, I've another killer idea. Anyone ever heard of Vivendi-Universal? |
| 8.82 |
2,589 |
2002-08-09 |
1 |
No |
Playing Day of Defeat while on the phone with your woman can really stress an otherwise healthy relationship |
| 8.44 |
1,921 |
2002-08-10 |
0 |
Yes |
Duke Nukem was probably a better strip poker player than me |
| 7.31 |
2,423 |
2002-08-12 |
0 |
No |
I sent my resume and portfolio to the Unreal team, unaware of what was to follow. |
| 8.38 |
1,899 |
2002-08-13 |
0 |
No |
Our LAN administrator has been rigging our Warcraft III games using remote desktops |
| 6.74 |
1,880 |
2002-08-14 |
0 |
No |
Good base defense requires intimate awareness of one's surroundings and uncanny perception |
| 8.84 |
1,668 |
2002-08-15 |
1 |
No |
The PR355 N1NJ4 returns! Operation: QuakeCon Doomiltration |
| 6.29 |
2,069 |
2002-08-16 |
0 |
No |
And now it is time for the glorious peoples' reinstall! |
| 8.64 |
1,837 |
2002-08-18 |
0 |
Yes |
Miscommunication is the cornerstone of any dysfunctional gamer relationship |
| 8.00 |
2,540 |
2002-08-19 |
0 |
No |
The top-of-the-line PC I ordered was obsolete before I finished entering my credit card number |
| 6.93 |
1,778 |
2002-08-20 |
0 |
No |
For months I agonized over where to get toner cartridges -- and then, WHAMS! There was the answer, right in my email! |
| 7.56 |
2,250 |
2002-08-21 |
0 |
No |
I'd like you to meet my friend Jared. He's in Doom III denial. |
| 8.47 |
2,352 |
2002-08-22 |
1 |
No |
Look dammit, this is your third and last tank, Herr Kommandant. |
| 8.25 |
2,577 |
2002-08-23 |
0 |
No |
My new cable modem has taught me universal truths that I didn't want to know. |
| 9.00 |
2,175 |
2002-08-24 |
2 |
Yes |
A Pr355 N1nj4 has no respect for the term 'Closed' Beta |
| 6.46 |
1,796 |
2002-08-26 |
0 |
No |
Doom III's new lighting effects will harken a new 'Dark Age' of gameplay! |
| 8.21 |
1,938 |
2002-08-27 |
1 |
No |
Our company will go to great lengths to ensure that we keep our QA department |
| 7.85 |
2,143 |
2002-08-28 |
2 |
No |
I think the issue here is that the 'Horrifying Human Wave Attack' is simply not the best multiplayer strategy. |
| 7.16 |
1,531 |
2002-08-30 |
0 |
No |
You leave me no choice but to implement a 'Scorched Earth' Monkey Ball policy |
| 8.80 |
1,901 |
2002-09-01 |
1 |
Yes |
In my expert, mechanical opinion, the problem is that your tank is stuck in a tree. |
| 6.59 |
1,643 |
2002-09-03 |
0 |
No |
My 'Platforms Floating in Space' skills are honed to perfection, sir. |
| 5.88 |
2,461 |
2002-09-05 |
0 |
No |
I've put off that PC hardware upgrade for hours. It's time! |
| 8.74 |
2,768 |
2002-09-06 |
2 |
No |
You want to play Battlefield again? What, you're missing a hood ornament? |
| 9.19 |
2,902 |
2002-09-07 |
1 |
Yes |
Good Quality Assurance is hard to fake. Especially wearing this. |
| 8.60 |
2,066 |
2002-09-08 |
0 |
No |
Lemme tell you about the geek that got away... |
| 8.90 |
3,226 |
2002-09-10 |
3 |
No |
My Dad's a smart guy, but his plans for handling Battlefield 1942 snipers are somewhat unorthodox |
| 5.31 |
1,678 |
2002-09-11 |
0 |
No |
When they needs the bananas, nine out of ten Yoshis come to me. |
| 6.73 |
1,870 |
2002-09-12 |
0 |
No |
The world’s smallest violin and I wish to discuss the loss of your WarCraft III hero |
| 8.57 |
2,596 |
2002-09-13 |
0 |
No |
Man, I would give anything for a hit of whatever dope the driver of this tank is smoking. |
| 9.28 |
4,825 |
2002-09-15 |
2 |
Yes |
Playing Battlefield 1942 with you is like playing Carmageddon. |
| 7.06 |
1,738 |
2002-09-16 |
0 |
No |
My Unreal Bombing Run tactics make great men weep and lesser men crumble. |
| 7.68 |
1,621 |
2002-09-17 |
0 |
No |
That new kitten is either howling from fear or mocking my Unreal Tournament skillz. |
| 8.08 |
2,066 |
2002-09-18 |
2 |
No |
Until I find out who chopped my coconut tree, the Animal Crossing hatchet executions will COMMENCE! |
| 8.64 |
2,451 |
2002-09-19 |
3 |
No |
‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’ is making it really difficult to coordinate my Battlefield 1942 team. |
| 6.43 |
1,922 |
2002-09-20 |
0 |
No |
This morning when I turned on Animal Crossing, there was a severed horse head in my bed |
| 8.52 |
1,756 |
2002-09-21 |
2 |
Yes |
I'll never understand the fixation with my dad's unorthodox Battlfield 1942 tactics. |
| 9.08 |
2,678 |
2002-09-23 |
1 |
No |
A hideous surreality hung over this Battlefield 1942 server ... like a cloud. |
| 7.59 |
1,756 |
2002-09-24 |
2 |
No |
For some reason drawing a penis on my door in Animal Crossing seemed like a good idea at the time. |
| 8.24 |
1,705 |
2002-09-25 |
0 |
No |
Well, yes, I was hoping Dexter Events Consultants could help me plan for my next LAN party: “Operation St0nkd0wn.” |
| 9.33 |
5,437 |
2002-09-26 |
3 |
No |
The loss of our Sinistar Arcade machine was a bitter, bitter blow. |
| 7.45 |
1,913 |
2002-09-27 |
2 |
No |
Man, how can you cheat in Animal Crossing? Doesn’t it make you feel dirty? |
| 9.07 |
2,703 |
2002-09-28 |
3 |
Yes |
My teammates won’t stop talking like pirates, but I’ve kinda warmed to the idea. |
| 7.66 |
2,103 |
2002-09-30 |
0 |
No |
I seemed to have joined an Unreal Tournament 2003 server filled with Dadaists. |
| 8.05 |
1,981 |
2002-10-01 |
0 |
No |
So, you got a bootleg copy of the second Lord of the Rings movie? That’s nothing. I know a feller who has a book of the third one |
| 7.95 |
2,271 |
2002-10-02 |
1 |
No |
Ah! Would that I could play Battlefield: 1942 for a living. |
| 7.21 |
1,947 |
2002-10-03 |
0 |
No |
The problem with the WaveBird Wireless Controller is that you can chuck it. Far. |
| 9.28 |
5,975 |
2002-10-04 |
1 |
No |
Until now, Twinking people in online RPGs has been a reward in and of itself. |
| 9.16 |
2,318 |
2002-10-06 |
1 |
Yes |
You ever resuscitate a dead arcade machine? It can get pretty ugly. |
| 7.35 |
2,335 |
2002-10-07 |
0 |
No |
Whhoooooaa, honey, we gotta buy this vacuum cleaner, it looks like something the Protoss would use. |
| 8.02 |
2,231 |
2002-10-08 |
5 |
No |
Hey guys? Guys? Could you stop playing Navy Seals a sec? I’ve got kinda a situation here. |
| 9.01 |
2,563 |
2002-10-09 |
1 |
No |
All right! ‘Tied-up’ dude is back online! |
| 7.06 |
1,871 |
2002-10-10 |
0 |
No |
This Sim needs some sort of Sock Puppet intervention |
| 6.16 |
1,852 |
2002-10-11 |
0 |
No |
Laugh all you want, this is the only way I can play Need for Speed without getting mad vertigo |
| 9.25 |
4,329 |
2002-10-12 |
7 |
Yes |
I’d never thought that the power of Twinking people in RPGs could be used for evil |
| 8.51 |
2,831 |
2002-10-14 |
2 |
No |
So I said, “Honey, before we jump right in and buy a kitten, maybe we should consult The Sims” |
| 8.30 |
2,573 |
2002-10-17 |
0 |
No |
Wow, that “Ghandi” dude is one ornery killing machine. |
| 7.46 |
2,083 |
2002-10-18 |
0 |
No |
If only I had known space travel was so easy before I bought my Ferrari |
| 9.00 |
1,951 |
2002-10-20 |
0 |
Yes |
A true Internet entrepreneur can really profit from someone like ‘Tied-Up Guy.’ |
| 8.51 |
2,152 |
2002-10-21 |
1 |
No |
There’s a lot of money to be made as an eBay Fictionalizationizer. |
| 8.89 |
2,310 |
2002-10-22 |
1 |
No |
Team killing is a disease, and I’m not the cure |
| 7.37 |
1,920 |
2002-10-23 |
0 |
No |
MWA-HAAH! My skillful machinations have allowed me to absolutely corner the burgeoning Sims Online Lawn Gnome market! |
| 8.89 |
2,536 |
2002-10-24 |
0 |
No |
This whole ‘Relaxing Zen Garden’ thing is really wiggin’ me out. |
| 6.92 |
2,034 |
2002-10-25 |
0 |
No |
C’mon, let’s lay off the Soccering and start with the rioting! |
| 7.41 |
2,297 |
2002-10-27 |
1 |
Yes |
It’s not a good idea to use The Sims to make important family decisions. |
| 8.65 |
2,790 |
2002-10-29 |
1 |
No |
Oh yah -- there’s not a single thing you can do or say in Counter-Strike that I haven’t bound to a single keystroke! |
| 8.48 |
2,178 |
2002-10-30 |
0 |
No |
I just had to pull a grand theft Grand Theft Auto |
| 7.41 |
2,239 |
2002-10-31 |
0 |
No |
Nobody wants to get it on with the Fat Undead Guy from Doom III. |
| 7.69 |
2,620 |
2002-11-01 |
0 |
No |
I worry about the influence of Grand Theft Auto, but not because of the language or violence |
| 8.80 |
2,415 |
2002-11-03 |
0 |
Yes |
When it comes to Team-Killing, I’m a conscientious objector. |
| 7.80 |
2,212 |
2002-11-04 |
1 |
No |
Look here, I want Mario Sunshine for Christmas ... Or I’m gonna start livin’ the dream, baby! |
| 7.78 |
1,878 |
2002-11-05 |
0 |
No |
I’m voting on a straight “Video Game” platform. |
| 6.96 |
2,411 |
2002-11-06 |
0 |
No |
Whhooaaa - check it OUT! The guy across the street has a leaked DOOM III executable! |
| 8.31 |
2,641 |
2002-11-07 |
1 |
No |
Until today I had operated under the flawed assumption that I was the tech God |
| 8.77 |
3,169 |
2002-11-09 |
1 |
Yes |
I am the King of Macros ... and I just met my Queen |
| 8.21 |
2,094 |
2002-11-12 |
2 |
No |
Your poor performance with the aircraft carrier has prompted me to resume the practice of naval flogging |
| 6.99 |
2,592 |
2002-11-13 |
0 |
No |
What kind of crazy whack-job emoticons is this EverQuest chick sending me!? |
| 8.51 |
2,733 |
2002-11-14 |
1 |
No |
As a professional gamer, my recent onset of motion sickness has qualified me for disability benefits. |
| 9.01 |
1,910 |
2002-11-16 |
0 |
No |
Playing games like EverQuest over a cell phone presents unique challenges. |
| 6.60 |
2,290 |
2002-11-18 |
0 |
No |
Percy is in need of comforting after the second Harry Potter movie. |
| 7.10 |
2,647 |
2002-11-21 |
0 |
No |
I just got one of those new cell-phone PDA dealies. That’s the kind of thing you spend money on when you don’t have a girl. |
| 8.48 |
2,225 |
2002-11-24 |
1 |
Yes |
With my professional gaming career on the rocks, I opted to become a color commentator |
| 7.48 |
2,222 |
2002-11-26 |
2 |
No |
To truly master Tekken 4, one must learn to bend like the autumn leaf. Like that’s ever gonna happen. |
| 9.14 |
3,796 |
2002-11-27 |
1 |
No |
My TiVo thinks I’m Japanese. |
| 7.92 |
2,033 |
2002-11-28 |
0 |
No |
The Daily Victim Thanksgiving Special 2002 |
| 7.61 |
2,146 |
2002-12-02 |
0 |
No |
I’ve devised the perfect controller with which to play first-person shooters on a console |
| 8.08 |
2,606 |
2002-12-03 |
0 |
No |
This new PC game is just a blank CD with instructions on the label for how to get the patch. |
| 7.83 |
2,124 |
2002-12-04 |
0 |
No |
Attention people of the Morrowind Expansion Pack: Do you, too, wish to bring it? |
| 7.67 |
2,022 |
2002-12-05 |
0 |
No |
It is time for those of us wise in the ways of martial combat to stand against our unfair portrayal in the videogame media |
| 7.86 |
2,352 |
2002-12-06 |
0 |
No |
I’m sorry Germany, but the Pope told me to take you down! |
| 7.88 |
2,445 |
2002-12-08 |
0 |
Yes |
My TiVo wants me dead. |
| 8.16 |
2,650 |
2002-12-10 |
1 |
No |
Okay man, listen up: I’ve developed a 32-step program designed to get my hot girlfriend into Cosplay. |
| 8.36 |
1,998 |
2002-12-11 |
0 |
No |
For our fiscal year 2003 planning meeting, I’d like to suggest we employ a Medieval: Total War business strategy. |
| 8.85 |
2,733 |
2002-12-12 |
1 |
No |
Don’t go in there! Hans’s game of Medieval: Total War has spun into a harrowing Caligula-like descent into debauchery! |
| 7.91 |
1,923 |
2002-12-16 |
0 |
No |
No man, the problem is, the guy at the Returns desk is an ex insurance claims investigator. |
| 7.99 |
2,229 |
2002-12-17 |
0 |
No |
Okay, new plan. Our new MMORPG game will be coded entirely using the Macromedia Flash MX 30-day trial. So we have to work fast. |
| 7.66 |
2,258 |
2002-12-19 |
0 |
No |
You’d best be showing us that ladder full of orcs falling into the army of orcs, and you’d best be showing the whole thing. |
| 8.65 |
2,789 |
2002-12-20 |
1 |
No |
What if a game were so good that anyone playing it dropped off the face of the Earth? How would you find out about it? |
| 8.50 |
2,385 |
2002-12-24 |
0 |
Yes |
The Daily Victim Christmas Special 2002 |
| 6.98 |
1,803 |
2002-12-31 |
0 |
No |
I’ve been playing the Army computer game for months. Where’s my money for college? |
| 8.44 |
2,009 |
2003-01-01 |
3 |
No |
MY New Year’s Resolution revolves around the cheese-grating-like decimation of you, and all your stupid Elves! |
| 7.53 |
2,078 |
2003-01-02 |
1 |
No |
I’m just too nice for all of these ‘Open Ended’ RPGs. |
| 6.88 |
1,592 |
2003-01-03 |
0 |
No |
I have an urgent decision to undertake with regards to Mario Party and the mattress outside |
| 8.28 |
1,556 |
2003-01-05 |
0 |
Yes |
Move over! When King Hans plays Medieval: Total War, he demands that his steaks RARE. Still mooing, even. |
| 8.74 |
2,500 |
2003-01-07 |
1 |
No |
An entire generation didn’t graduate from Clarion College in 1992 because I installed Civilization into the computer labs. |
| 8.54 |
2,253 |
2003-01-08 |
1 |
No |
Just lie low and follow my lead, dude. We’ll get this PlayStation 2 mod-chipped. You just gotta know the right people. |
| 8.99 |
2,506 |
2003-01-09 |
2 |
No |
Anything less than third-degree burns is no reason to quit a perfectly good game of WarCraft III. |
| 8.44 |
1,946 |
2003-01-10 |
1 |
No |
But sir, Battle.net’s policy about disconnects makes no exceptions if your house blows up. It’s in the EULA. |
| 8.54 |
1,990 |
2003-01-12 |
1 |
No |
I’m being hounded by some elf dude just ‘cuz I kicked his rear in Warcraft. |
| 8.81 |
1,710 |
2003-01-13 |
2 |
No |
Those movies not withstanding, I really think us elves are getting misrepresented in the media. |
| 9.24 |
3,057 |
2003-01-14 |
6 |
No |
Online weddings, online schmeddings. Like I’m supposed to get all hopped up about the marriage of “Lady Gloria Perfectteeth.” |
| 9.06 |
2,129 |
2003-01-15 |
3 |
No |
It’s amazing the kind of lewt you can nab when someone fireballs an online RPG wedding party. |
| 8.79 |
2,025 |
2003-01-16 |
2 |
No |
Don’t be mislead. The REAL money in organized crime comes from illicit online auctions of online RPG lewt. |
| 8.04 |
1,992 |
2003-01-20 |
1 |
No |
Are you trying to tell me that these leather gauntlets did not actually belong to Clint Eastwood? |
| 8.28 |
1,936 |
2003-01-21 |
2 |
No |
Just ‘cuz a guy plays as a chick in an RPG isn’t any reason to nullify his online wedding. Er, HER wedding. |
| 8.85 |
1,579 |
2003-01-22 |
3 |
No |
At long last I can finally live the dream and play Battlefield: 1942 for a living. |
| 8.55 |
2,007 |
2003-01-23 |
2 |
No |
Those weird war-dudes have taken over our LAN gaming center |
| 8.43 |
4,103 |
2003-01-24 |
1 |
No |
Who ever told you that trying to seduce a gamer was easy? |
| 9.21 |
3,511 |
2003-02-01 |
2 |
Yes |
It was a Battlefield game that will live in infamy. If, by infamy, you mean easily forgotten weakness. |
| 8.30 |
2,500 |
2003-02-05 |
0 |
No |
Moving to Tokyo in order to be the first to play Soul Calibur II has its downsides. |
| 8.98 |
4,322 |
2003-02-06 |
1 |
No |
Yo, Frank, can you please stop using obscenities as city names in Sim City 4? |
| 8.53 |
2,799 |
2003-02-09 |
0 |
Yes |
That’s it, I’m through. I’ve decided to stop dating gamers. |
| 8.45 |
2,405 |
2003-02-11 |
0 |
No |
My cat should be a Metal Gear “Fox-Hound” Special Operative. |
| 7.89 |
2,552 |
2003-02-12 |
0 |
No |
Wolfenstien’s few. The proud. The mangled Venom-wielders screaming for medics. |
| 7.31 |
2,852 |
2003-02-14 |
0 |
No |
Hey honey, didja ever smoke a chia-pet? |
| 8.71 |
3,671 |
2003-02-16 |
1 |
Yes |
EA Technical Support was not amused by your semi-pornographic SimCity town names. |
| 6.81 |
2,991 |
2003-02-20 |
0 |
No |
Guys, I figured out how to smuggle a PS2 and EQ Online Adventures into school. |
| 7.90 |
2,883 |
2003-02-23 |
0 |
No |
Hey you kids! Stop bazookaing your teammates into the water! |
| 7.66 |
2,911 |
2003-02-26 |
0 |
No |
We’ve got to stop hiring people just because they’re good at LAN parties. |
| 7.39 |
2,099 |
2003-03-04 |
0 |
No |
I Have a Great Idea for a Daily Victim, Provided You Fill Out the Following Paperwork. |
| 7.48 |
2,174 |
2003-03-05 |
2 |
No |
I have what I believe to be conclusive evidence that the Archon’s Minions EverQuest guild FAKED the Dragon-Slayings. |
| 8.43 |
2,474 |
2003-03-06 |
1 |
No |
I take issue with yesterday’s assertion that my guild faked the EverQuest dragon-slaying. |
| 8.35 |
2,593 |
2003-03-11 |
0 |
No |
I’ve played so many World War II games that they’ve long since ceased to have any individual significance. |
| 8.51 |
2,011 |
2003-03-12 |
0 |
No |
For the upcoming conflict in the gulf, we’ll be sending our foremost experts in grenade-jumping. |
| 9.31 |
5,253 |
2003-03-13 |
2 |
No |
My love of survival horror games has perverted the delicate sensibilities of my parrot. |
| 7.78 |
2,383 |
2003-03-14 |
0 |
No |
How many times I gotta tell you, Ned? There is no PK’ing in The Sims Online. |
| 8.18 |
2,700 |
2003-03-16 |
0 |
Yes |
Ladies, gentlemen, I believe the time has come for our EverQuest guild to fake its own death. |
| 7.10 |
3,364 |
2003-03-20 |
0 |
No |
That’s a typo -- my emoticon is not actually drooling. |
| 6.57 |
2,940 |
2003-03-26 |
1 |
No |
Thank you, Legend of Zelda! I finally have a vehicle to vent my rage against ... plants! |
| 8.26 |
2,284 |
2003-03-31 |
0 |
No |
Hello kind shopkeeper, I’m here to examine your pottery. And by ‘examine’ I mean ‘smash until gems come out.’ |
| 8.04 |
2,276 |
2003-04-01 |
0 |
No |
Our PC game isn’t delayed; I prefer the term, “Extended Development.” |
| 8.34 |
1,947 |
2003-04-03 |
1 |
No |
My recent homecoming to Animal Crossing was not the joyous reunion I expected. |
| 8.07 |
1,963 |
2003-04-04 |
0 |
No |
The ruins of our Animal Crossing town are best cleared by an elite group of heavily-armed special ops units. |
| 7.53 |
2,900 |
2003-04-07 |
1 |
No |
Believe tha messageboardz: My PlanetSide faction wi11 CRUSH J00! |
| 7.84 |
2,025 |
2003-04-14 |
4 |
No |
Okay, I’m going to say it one last time. Hand over the Game Boy. Your Tingle privileges are revoked. |
| 7.44 |
1,920 |
2003-04-15 |
5 |
No |
Bad Tingle? No bad Tingle! Tingle is good! Tingle is a GOOD Tingle! |
| 7.72 |
1,597 |
2003-04-16 |
3 |
No |
What did you do to Steve? I saw him taking off in his Tingle outfit, weeping and carrying a grappling hook and a weed eater. |
| 8.36 |
1,776 |
2003-04-17 |
2 |
No |
No, sir. The Tingle is armed, and almost definitely dangerous. I think he's got a bomb. |
| 8.18 |
1,630 |
2003-04-18 |
1 |
No |
In order to find a Tingle, you need to start THINKING like a Tingle. |
| 8.61 |
1,775 |
2003-04-20 |
1 |
Yes |
What follows is a true account of the greatest Tingle that ever lived |
| 7.34 |
1,693 |
2003-04-21 |
5 |
No |
Dance Dance Story Part I: An Important Message from the Minstrel of Ph4t B33tz |
| 7.75 |
1,369 |
2003-04-23 |
4 |
No |
Lesser men have been able to bring down the house; but when you bring down the hizzouse, it requires special pants. |
| 8.01 |
1,585 |
2003-04-24 |
3 |
No |
They say that love springs eternal; but can it freestyle into a Caution Drop on DDR Extreme? |
| 8.70 |
1,534 |
2003-04-25 |
1 |
No |
Dude, I know that you love this girl, but what you’re talking about isn’t merely winning an arcade game -- it’s suicide! |
| 8.42 |
1,221 |
2003-04-26 |
1 |
No |
Pssst, ladies. I understand you have a love problem with those boys from the arcade. Might I offer advice? |
| 8.59 |
1,869 |
2003-04-27 |
0 |
Yes |
Dance Dance Story: A tale of love and phat beetz ends. |
| 8.49 |
2,232 |
2003-04-29 |
0 |
No |
I love editing my own videogame baseball team. Instead of nine well-balanced players, my team consists of five mutants. |
| 8.95 |
3,734 |
2003-05-01 |
1 |
No |
I lost my job at the grocery store today for cranking up the difficulty on the checkout belt. |
| 7.97 |
2,983 |
2003-05-05 |
0 |
No |
Aw man. Just look at you, dude. I knew I shouldn’t have given you that old copy of Harvest Moon. |
| 8.00 |
1,739 |
2003-05-11 |
4 |
No |
You guys, I’m serious. This big E3 tradeshow is our best and only chance to buy Vivendi! |
| 9.12 |
2,369 |
2003-05-13 |
0 |
No |
Security at E3 was tight. But not as tight as a finely crafted, masterfully executed backup plan. |
| 8.58 |
2,460 |
2003-05-15 |
0 |
No |
I am a fully trained Pr355 N1nj4. I alone have the sixth freedom. |
| 7.46 |
2,084 |
2003-05-18 |
0 |
No |
Wow, Your Online Console Game Looks Great. But It's Lacking a Few "emergency" Features... |
| 7.19 |
1,961 |
2003-05-23 |
0 |
No |
Many readers simply don't understand what qualifies a game for the "Tingle Awards." |
| 8.06 |
2,659 |
2003-05-28 |
0 |
No |
We've got a lock on "The One." He's running through the post office level banging on the "x" button repeatedly. |
| 8.49 |
2,868 |
2003-05-30 |
2 |
No |
In PlanetSide, I've perfected a new type of class. "Support Slacker." |
| 8.03 |
1,977 |
2003-06-03 |
0 |
No |
The physics from my recent auto accident weren't at all realistic. |
| 8.67 |
1,827 |
2003-06-04 |
1 |
No |
Guys, guys -- the problem here, as I see it, is that our entire team is a bunch of Support Slackers. |
| 8.05 |
1,745 |
2003-06-05 |
0 |
No |
Listen up, people! As Ultima Online Griefers, a new golden age is now upon us. |
| 8.12 |
1,456 |
2003-06-06 |
0 |
No |
What is this? You guys call THIS a game trailer? Step aside and let me show you how to edit. |
| 9.09 |
3,448 |
2003-06-07 |
0 |
Yes |
This invasion is unlike any invasion I've ever slacked onto before. |
| 7.51 |
1,920 |
2003-06-10 |
1 |
No |
My interview at the movie theater went downhill fast when they started talking strategy. |
| 8.20 |
2,697 |
2003-06-11 |
0 |
No |
This Star Wars Galaxies beta NDA is going to tear our friendship apart. |
| 8.15 |
1,646 |
2003-06-17 |
0 |
No |
With rain clouds coming, I had to pull a Project Gotham with the riding lawnmower. |
| 8.59 |
1,668 |
2003-06-18 |
0 |
No |
My original plan was to set this wedding reception alight by overclocking the Electric Slide... |
| 8.31 |
1,823 |
2003-06-19 |
0 |
No |
WarioWare can easily bring about marital difficulties. |
| 8.79 |
3,377 |
2003-06-20 |
0 |
No |
I managed to install Civilization onto the school's library Computers, but at what cost? |
| 8.30 |
1,923 |
2003-06-25 |
0 |
No |
Shhh, keep your voices down. That guy's been playing a single game of 'snake' on his cell phone for a week straight. |
| 7.19 |
2,365 |
2003-06-26 |
0 |
No |
I didn't want the bank I work for to know I'd applied to a job at a gaming company, so I wrote all my emails in 'l33t.' |
| 7.75 |
1,557 |
2003-07-01 |
1 |
No |
No man, it's all cool. I'm just going to write off my EverQuest Dwarf as a tax loss. |
| 7.07 |
1,863 |
2003-07-02 |
0 |
No |
Honey, what do you want from me? The Imperial March is in my head. I have to play Galaxies! |
| 8.68 |
2,307 |
2003-07-03 |
0 |
No |
Kids: Game Boy and Jury Duty DON'T MIX. |
| 7.92 |
2,007 |
2003-07-06 |
0 |
No |
Oh no sir! You can't bring that inside this cantina! |
| 8.04 |
1,930 |
2003-07-08 |
0 |
No |
I just can't stop killin' Rebel scum! |
| 5.89 |
2,078 |
2003-07-09 |
0 |
No |
Keep the ... get them ... oh ... put the mouse droids away please! |
| 7.57 |
2,798 |
2003-07-10 |
0 |
No |
Oh yah? That's nothing. I play Quake 3 in 16384x12288 resolution. |
| 7.95 |
1,871 |
2003-07-11 |
0 |
No |
I'll tell you when I've had enuff, just fork over the ale, Neverwinter wench! |
| 7.86 |
1,795 |
2003-07-12 |
0 |
Yes |
No! Stop twinking my Dwarf! He's a tax writeoff! |
| 7.82 |
2,826 |
2003-07-15 |
1 |
No |
Knights of the Old Republic is so great it will crush you physically and emotionally! |
| 6.82 |
3,083 |
2003-07-17 |
0 |
No |
AUGH! HotSoup's computer crashed before he finished drawing my legs! |
| 8.62 |
1,585 |
2003-08-04 |
0 |
No |
You've never looked fear in the eye? Let me tell you about my experience with Link Dead, ace online pilot. |
| 7.16 |
1,691 |
2003-08-05 |
0 |
No |
If a foodstuff can't be prepared in between rounds of Medal of Honor, I'm not interested! |
| 7.01 |
1,598 |
2003-08-06 |
0 |
No |
I'm sorry to hear that you and your girlfriend broke up. She seemed perfect for you. You know. From what I could gather on IRC. |
| 7.38 |
2,799 |
2003-08-07 |
0 |
No |
Less talking, more light-sabering! |
| 8.85 |
2,703 |
2003-08-12 |
0 |
No |
EGAH! It's the most feared Sith Lord of any of the Star Wars Galaxies servers! |
| 7.17 |
1,518 |
2003-08-14 |
0 |
No |
My Madden 2004 Strategy is a combination of grit, strategic thinking, and end-zone interceptions leading to 99-yard touchdowns. |
| 8.70 |
2,832 |
2003-08-15 |
0 |
No |
I TOLD you you didn't need that many monitors. NOW look at what happened. |
| 8.96 |
2,335 |
2003-08-18 |
0 |
No |
So, you'd like to camp planes with us in Battlefield 1942? You'll have to fill out some of this paperwork. |
| 8.00 |
2,472 |
2003-08-20 |
0 |
No |
My new phone service has unlimited instant text messaging! It will usher in a new era of open communication! |
| 7.37 |
2,048 |
2003-08-21 |
0 |
No |
You're paying for my fansite to come out and preview your new game? Me and my 20 friends are SO there! |
| 8.76 |
1,764 |
2003-08-26 |
0 |
No |
Battlefield 1942 Scientific Journal for August 26th, 2003 |
| 8.41 |
1,742 |
2003-08-27 |
0 |
No |
To my friends, family, and loved ones: I would like to apologize in advance for the weekend of debauchery I'm planning on Tatooine. |
| 7.85 |
1,799 |
2003-08-28 |
0 |
No |
I clubbed a sales clerk unconscious and I'll do the same to you! |
| 7.64 |
1,814 |
2003-08-29 |
0 |
No |
Avast, ye sea doggies! Hand yer captain a manual or something! |
| 7.77 |
1,333 |
2003-09-02 |
0 |
No |
I'd love to help you fend of the Empire's invasion, but it's past my bedtime. |
| 8.18 |
1,943 |
2003-09-03 |
0 |
No |
What, no Alienware PC for my birthday!? It's not like I asked for guns! Or drugs! |
| 8.15 |
2,103 |
2003-09-04 |
0 |
No |
What, you want to talk to that girl? No way man, you don't stand a chance. She cons yellow to you. Maybe red. |
| 5.77 |
1,658 |
2003-09-05 |
0 |
No |
Maybe I should switch to the Du-Rag. A man's got to put a lot of thought into these things. |
| 7.57 |
1,710 |
2003-09-08 |
0 |
No |
My new mod for War III is a conversion to a mod I made for Starcraft that emulated my WarCraft II mod that emulated C&C! |
| 9.14 |
2,540 |
2003-09-09 |
0 |
No |
Bad Things happened when I inadvertently released my own game patch. |
| 8.40 |
2,457 |
2003-09-10 |
0 |
No |
j4bb3rw0xx0r Presents: The Diablo II Drinking Game! |
| 7.21 |
1,806 |
2003-09-11 |
0 |
No |
Ubisoft's new logo is driving icicles of pure thought directly into my unwilling BRAIN. |
| 8.45 |
2,553 |
2003-09-12 |
0 |
No |
My 6-month plan to get my hot girlfriend into Cosplay has colossally backfired. |
| 9.01 |
2,061 |
2003-09-16 |
0 |
No |
What hideous depraved intelligence is concocting such a grotesque perversion of Starcraft strategy, and why is it working? |
| 8.28 |
1,789 |
2003-09-17 |
0 |
No |
Physics, man. It's never too early to prepare for the Physics. |
| 8.75 |
1,746 |
2003-09-19 |
0 |
Yes |
There's a crippling loss of personal dignity associated with this year's 'Talk Like a Pirate Day.' |
| 8.01 |
2,073 |
2003-09-22 |
0 |
No |
I lost my job at the Hospital just for trying to get the high score on the EKG |
| 7.65 |
1,790 |
2003-09-23 |
0 |
No |
Why can't you people just take the hint and get as addicted to Tiger Woods as I am? |
| 7.52 |
2,354 |
2003-09-26 |
0 |
No |
You tell the captain of this plane that my GameBoy is almost out of batteries! Now MUSH! |
| 7.65 |
2,221 |
2003-09-29 |
0 |
No |
For God's sake! Pick up the blue dot! A man's life is at stake! |
| 6.70 |
1,436 |
2003-10-01 |
0 |
No |
Three words, my friend, three words: Massively Multiplayer Curling. |
| 8.64 |
2,296 |
2003-10-02 |
0 |
No |
If you yell "Sniper" into my ear ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to rip your lips off. |
| 7.59 |
2,061 |
2003-10-03 |
0 |
No |
Well Jer, no, putting that new Radeon card down your pants isn't what I'd consider a "Casemod" in the classical sense |
| 8.01 |
2,152 |
2003-10-06 |
0 |
No |
What kind of roleplaying game is it? Does it have towns? After playing hundreds of RPGs in my lifetime, I've developed a fear of towns. |
| 8.52 |
2,389 |
2003-10-07 |
1 |
No |
I can't possibly clean up my hard drive. I'm too emotionally invested. |
| 8.28 |
2,249 |
2003-10-09 |
0 |
No |
I will be brutally honest. There's no way you look like your Tiger Woods 2004 character. |
| 8.07 |
2,601 |
2003-10-13 |
0 |
No |
I'll go on the record and say that I don't think what you downloaded here is actually the Half-Life 2 source code. |
| 7.71 |
1,763 |
2003-10-15 |
0 |
No |
Sure it's legit. It's what I call the Star Wars Galaxies MBA program. |
| 7.80 |
2,268 |
2003-10-16 |
0 |
No |
My Contra-Honed Reflexes can defeat your piddly game in mere hours! |
| 8.42 |
1,916 |
2003-10-20 |
0 |
No |
Gentlemen, if you please. Remove your network cables for a moment of Internet silence in honor of our dear friend Dave. |
| 8.18 |
2,303 |
2003-10-21 |
0 |
No |
Mr. Pembleton's last will and testament clearly establishes this trust fund for his favorite MMOG character. |
| 7.76 |
3,332 |
2003-10-24 |
0 |
No |
So uh guys ... about that whole ... "ring" thing... |
| 7.55 |
1,994 |
2003-10-27 |
0 |
No |
So, you just jumped out of a burning building into a hail of machine gun fire? CHILD'S PLAY! |
| 4.98 |
2,779 |
2003-10-29 |
0 |
No |
One word, dude: Halo. |
| 9.16 |
3,762 |
2003-10-31 |
1 |
No |
A Special Halloween Victim of Unmitigated Horror |
| 7.43 |
2,149 |
2003-11-03 |
0 |
No |
Nope, can't play Call of Duty. Doctor's Orders. You'll have to do it for me. |
| 8.15 |
2,764 |
2003-11-05 |
0 |
No |
Now that there's a child in the house, I'm only permitted to play Disney's Extreme Skate Adventure |
| 9.14 |
2,712 |
2003-11-10 |
0 |
No |
I warned him! I told him not to play with the EyeToy for an hour after eating, but he didn't listen! He didn't listen! |
| 7.96 |
3,042 |
2003-11-11 |
0 |
No |
Check it out -- look what I can see from this new satellite imaging website! |
| 8.30 |
2,361 |
2003-11-17 |
0 |
No |
My husband's online roleplaying habits are a serious source of marital strife. |
| 7.63 |
1,803 |
2003-11-19 |
0 |
No |
Honey, I've got a great idea for what to get little Kip for an E-rated Christmas! |
| 8.98 |
3,424 |
2003-11-20 |
0 |
No |
Wow, Project Gotham Guy has answers for everything. |
| 8.67 |
2,174 |
2003-11-26 |
1 |
No |
What would YOU give ... for the one, perfect lap? |
| 8.24 |
2,387 |
2003-11-27 |
0 |
No |
What, me? Carve the turkey? Well, I guess I got the skillz... |
| 9.12 |
2,430 |
2003-12-02 |
0 |
No |
Victory will be mine in this Battlefield 1942 map contest ... though I had to take some drastic actions. |
| 6.27 |
2,485 |
2003-12-03 |
0 |
No |
Happy Holidays, Skip. Here's your present. It's a gift certificate for ... A MANBEATING! |
| 6.93 |
1,923 |
2003-12-09 |
0 |
No |
I don't care what they say. Growing hairy feet is the hottest new geek trend. |
| 9.03 |
3,260 |
2003-12-11 |
0 |
No |
My Imaginary eBay Girlfriend Doesn't Understand My Gaming Hobby |
| 8.50 |
2,221 |
2003-12-15 |
1 |
No |
Stalingrad is a grey wasteland of rubble and human remains. Only One man can get across the railyard alive... |
| 8.47 |
2,098 |
2003-12-16 |
0 |
No |
The German Bunnyhopper is tearing our lines to shreds! We'll have to send in ... Sergei. |
| 8.25 |
3,330 |
2003-12-17 |
0 |
No |
Allright, gather 'round. I've developed a Call of Duty team strategy that speaks to all of our strengths. |
| 7.43 |
2,669 |
2003-12-30 |
1 |
No |
Hell no! Nerds won't go! We won't let you close Wizards of the Coast! |
| 7.82 |
1,516 |
2004-01-05 |
0 |
No |
I'd like to respectfully suggest that last week's Victim cram it in an uncomfortable place. |
| 9.01 |
2,174 |
2004-01-06 |
0 |
No |
No Haden, you're not allowed to play Mario Kart: Double Dash!! around the children. No, not because of the game, because of you. |
| 9.07 |
2,772 |
2004-01-07 |
4 |
No |
Well, there IS a way to get your dead character's lost items back, but ... well, it ain't pretty. |
| 8.00 |
3,255 |
2004-01-09 |
1 |
No |
Attention fellow roleplayers! The End is Nigh! And by Nigh, I mean Really, Really Close! |
| 9.57 |
6,777 |
2004-01-21 |
1 |
No |
My plan to crash my favorite MMORPG server required a little help from an unexpected place |
| 7.54 |
3,596 |
2004-01-23 |
0 |
No |
Thanks to that recent server crash, our online wedding never happened. Now get out of my house! |
| 7.28 |
2,261 |
2004-02-04 |
2 |
No |
The Search for a New Artist Rages On |
| 6.92 |
2,122 |
2004-02-18 |
1 |
No |
The Daily Victim artist search is wrapping up. Like the dismal closure of a lavish Broadway play. |
| 6.73 |
2,479 |
2004-03-16 |
1 |
No |
The Search for a New GameSpy Artist Remains Steeped in Controversy. |
| 0.00 |
0 |
2004-05-05 |
0 |
No |
The Daily Victim Redesign Is Cruising Smoothly ... like a Missile. |
| 0.00 |
0 |
2004-06-23 |
0 |
No |
A Brief but Illustrated Update on the Daily Victim |
| 0.00 |
0 |
2006-02-06 |
0 |
No |
People don't believe me because my name is Sarcasm |
| 0.00 |
0 |
2006-02-08 |
0 |
No |
I make my living by selling things on Ebay |